A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Hello all.! I have a love question / dillema. I met a guy I really loved when I was 19 yrs old. I really loved him, but we were young - he cheated on me, and we split. I was very hurt. Anyway we bumped into each othere a few years on, and he told me he had regretted us splitting ever since - and I told him I did not feel the same way anymore, as he had hurt me too much. He went off and married someone else about 15 years ago, and turned up at my house the week before his wedding in tears, asking me to take him back. he knew he was about to make a mistake, but wanted to settle down.They now have a ten and fifteen yr old boy. I and was still angry with him on some level, and he left. it was very sad. Anyway, we bumped into each other on and off over the next ten years, we would sometimes meet for drinks or dinner, and he would tell me how much he loved me, and how much he wished we could be togther. I still did not feel the same!! Anyway to cut a long story short, over the last 2 weeks I kept on thinking of him and decided that I needed to change how I felt about him ,and let go of my anger towards him, as it was not good for me. It has been as if i have been punishing him on some level for the last 20 years. I finally manged to let go of my poison, and once I did that I felt great, and contacted him. for the first time in 20 years I was excited to see him again. it was truly amazing. We got togther for a drink a couple of days back, and it was just like it was in the beggining. I felt loving, and amazing around him again . He even said that being out together for that afternoon was like the very beggining. He mentioned leaving his wife for me very soon, and us finally being together. I respect the fact that he is married, and would not under any circumstances have an affair with a married man, so I obviously wanted to tread carefully, and decided that I needed a 'sign' to see if this was the right move for everyones involved happiness which would included his wife and two boys. So , I 'wished ' for a sign to show me.. then... today - I met a fabulous looking guy when I was out shopping who I was very attracted to straight away (sods law a?) and we could not stop staring at each other . He wrote his number down and handed it to me. I have not texted or called him as yet. Now, does this mean that I am not to go back to the ex and be with him properley? as I guess I would not even consider contacting this new guy? is this a sign he is not right? do I contact him? I am seeing the ex for dinner at the end of this week. What does this all mean? thanks ;o)
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (22 March 2010):
He is a married man with a son. Leave him well alone. Married men are not suitable partners. Either he will use you and never leave the wife before dumping you again, or he will use you, leave his wife then dump you after. Leave the married man alone. He is the past. He hurt you, and will only hurt you again. Don't fall for the words of a married man.
You had your sign that you should leave the married man alone. Call that new guy instead.
Stop all contact with the married man, do not go back to him. You will waste time, and you'll end up looking pretty bad if you're found out. Your reputation will be left in a mess, his wife and his kid will truly hate you, and he will dump you and leave you hurt.
NEW GUY!! :).
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