A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I don't know what to do, someone has popped back into my life and am I making a big, big mistake even replying back or should i leave it in the past and move on...I used to be best friends with this girl, we were close all throughout college and all my best moments from then was with her. But after a while come our second year there, she randomly became rude, conceited, manipulative and very, very selfish! The way she treated me was poor of a best friend, let alone a friend. it's too long to list, but the things she did always left me being screwed over and sometimes going home in tears and she knew she'd upset me or that i would be annoyed at her and she never really cared, or showed any interest in apologising, i don't actually remember a time she did. I just felt I kept getting screwed over, again and again and again because of her.I told her i didn't want to be friends anymore after the final blow which when I came home, my whole family were fed up and said don't bother with her anymore, that she can't keep treating me like this and i didn't need a friend like her. Which they were right. But i came home during a break from university and we got back in contact and decided it's been a while, so to give our friendship another go when the college lot got together for a night out, but no! She didn't make any effort, not even to even talk to me, she was the same selfish, rude person as before just more obvious about it. I left early, so angry and upset at that she hadn't changed and again ruined my night. So I shut off all contact with her and haven't spoken to her in months.Till yesterday, when she messaged me out of nowhere, saying something reminded her of me and how she missed those times and us being friends. That she was really sorry and she wants us to be friends again. But I don't think that we can go back to that, of course i miss those times and all those memories so badly! But, that won't change that i don't need or want her as a friend. So what i'm asking is, should i reply telling her that, should i give our friendship another go, or should I just not reply at all and let her take the hint. They do say actions speak louder than words.... whats your guys take?
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female
reader, mooh  +, writes (28 May 2012):
She already had her second chance and completely ruined it on your first outing so i don't think anything would change . It's also too easy for her to send a short message and think it's going to mend everything. Best is probably to ignore her message and her.
A
male
reader, Xearo  +, writes (23 May 2012):
I don't see what benefit it could possibly have to TRY to be friends with her again. I think she needs to make way more effort than some simple message to show she cares or has even changed. I gave my friend the exact same advice. I told her as well that if the person did come back in their life, I would advise a very long leash. Personally, I just don't see the point.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 May 2012): If i were you i wouldnt rekindle the riendship. Some people fall out and for good reason. If she acted like that before how do you know that she has changed? Whats to stop it from happening all over again? Might save yourself some trouble.
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