A
male
age
41-50,
*hatcanisay
writes:i knows it's a little long, i really want a different point of view. thanks in advance... i love this woman and her son (not mine) w/ all my heart. all my friends and my mother tell me to stay away from her. i try to stay away and its hard, because i really do love her.she has lied to me several times. and if it's not a full lie, then she hides part of the truth. she tells one story at first and later the full truth comes out. she tells me she doesn't know why she does it. she claims that her parents are really hard on her, so she hides stuff from them. she said that's the reason why she does it to me. i bought up the fact that she doesn't hide anything from her bff. after that all she said was "never mind then, goodnight, know that i will always love you!"we all make mistakes in life, and i understand we are not perfect. my problem is that she has always lied to me. i love her and would love to make it work. the problem is that i will never trust her, or anything she tells me ever again. for us to make it work, i have to play the stupid boy friend/husband role. the one that she does whatever she wants, and he believes everything she says. i could never question anything. she tells me she will get help, she wants to be 100% honest w/ me, just to give her another chance. i would love to marry her and be together forever.should i give her another chance, and just play that role for ever? should i give her one last chance?should i do what the rest say, stay away from her?or should i just tell her the truth (something she cant tell me) that i do love her. just that she can never be honest w/ me, and say good bye forever??? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Ace2442 +, writes (5 December 2009):
agh really tough ..hmm..well you need to be really flat out honnest with her. Just tell her you need to start being honnest with me or im leaving end of story. Give her the cold shoulder for a littel bit. Let her prove to you she can be honnest. you know what im saying? and if she cant then i think you should stay away from her and find someone who loves you, but can also tell you the truth. Cause trust is the key part of haveing a stable healthy relationship.
A
male
reader, whatcanisay +, writes (4 December 2009):
whatcanisay is verified as being by the original poster of the questionCaringGuy thx for your reply... she told me today, she is going to get help.
...............................
A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (4 December 2009):
I think you've been lied to and failed enough if it's happened several times and she's said she will get help and hasn't. If she was getting help, I'd say have patience with her. But unless she gets help, there really is no point, because she won't change. Personally, I'd let her go.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 December 2009): People rarely change, and in her instance it doesn't sound like she even really wants to. Stay away, she's going to be nothing but trouble to you. Don't you want someone who is open and honest to be your wife??
...............................
|
