A
male
age
36-40,
*onfusedmuch
writes:Aunties! It has been over a year since my last post on here. It has been a great year of finding myself. Been single for well over a year have dated a couple of guys but nothing serious. As the old year comes to its closure and the new year is upon us, its in with the "new" and out with the "old". Just a couple days ago, my friend James from New York City, introduced me to a friend of his from Orlando. His thought was that we could get to know each other and hang out sometime while I am out there since it's almost 2 or 3 times a month. Now we have been talking for a few days and our conversations are very general and about day to day things. Something that I enjoy is that he is very talkative and really fun and down to earth to talk to. He is a very attractive guy and I think I am starting to like what I see and hear. Now what I am afraid of is to get into a long-distance relationship, especially a 'GAY Long-distance' relationship since they tend to be a bit volatile. I am willing to travel and see him at first and get to know him better in person, but also want to get some advice on what may happen if I do start falling for him as i already feel I am since I have enjoyed talking to him and I feel like he enjoys the same. Please aunty let me know what you think. I know this is sort of a vague question. I will post as the time goes and see where this goes. I have gotten go the point in my life where I would like to find the love of my life and I am willing to do anything for that to happen. Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (31 December 2010): What do you hope will happen if you start an LDR with this guy? Because I know that you're aware of what will happen. How it really just won't work.
LDR's that do work, the exceptionally rare ones that do. Well they're usually LDR's involving two people that are together for a hell of a long time, or they're military and have lots of support for this knd of thing.
What you're proposing is trying to build a relationship over a long distance and I think you know that the reality of that is very impractical. You can't build a romantic relationship with such limited physical and close contact. You really, really can't.
Don't get caught up in the dream that this guy would be worth trying for, he may be the man of your dreams but it would only be a nightmare trying to make that work. It really would.
Try and keep him as a friend, he sounds nice and he sounds like a good buddy you can hang out with when you're in his part of the world, try not to ruin that and try not to let the dream of love cloud your judgement, most people gay or not never make an LDR work. In fact it should be called an LDN, long distance nothing because you get nothing but words and brief encounters but not enough to foster a long lasting romantic bond.
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