A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost 6 months and he has a young son. Should I do something special for him for Fathers Day? I'm pretty sure his ex wife will get some something for him from their son but should I do something too?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 June 2013): If you *really* want to do something, just get him a simple card. But seriously, he is not your father and you are not the mother of his children, so it seems a bit much to do anything else. If his child was living with you and you had a huge role in parenting, then perhaps doing something with the son together for him would be very appropriate. I'd keep it simple or just wish him a happy father's day and leave it at that.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 June 2013): No he is not your father and you are not his son's mother. Your not even a step-mum. Leave it to your ex and their son. If anything surely you should leave them to have the day together alone after all its father day.
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A
female
reader, Got Issues  +, writes (11 June 2013):
 I wouldn't if I were you. I understand the mother of his child giving him something if the child is too young to do so himself but as his girlfriend you really don't need to. He's not your dad and he's not the father of your child. Sorry to be a cynic, but father's day is a way for companies to make money. Just wish him happy father's day. That way you show him that you acknowledge the importance of his role as a father without potentially stepping on anyone's toes.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 June 2013): No I don't think so. It is a family event and you're not his family, you only been dating 6 months.
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (11 June 2013):
 I feel ambivalent about this. On the one hand, like FA said, if you like giving gifts as a rule, then Father's day is an opportunity.
On the other hand, he's not YOUR father, and you're not the mother of his son. If you're doing it to compete, don't.
Other than that, cook him his favorite dinner and tell him Dads need their energy! Or, get him something small if you want to. Or, try some new sexual position you haven't before. Don't call him Daddy! heh. Or say "Happy Father's Day" at the moment of climax. :P
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A
female
reader, shrodingerscat +, writes (11 June 2013):
 Yeah, I think you should do something. You might ask him what sort of thing he'd be comfortable with getting, or any guidelines for what sort of gifts he'd like. It's better to ask and get an idea of what he'd like than try and guess and get it wrong! ^_^
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 June 2013): Follow your heart. If it gives you joy to acknowledge your boyfriend's fatherhood; by all means indulge him and yourself.
You are a sweet and generous person, and he will find it touching.
It's the thought that counts, so no need to go overboard.
Just a token of your affection, and a way to say he is appreciated; and you think he is a good dad to his son.
A card and something delicious will not downplay any gift(s) given by his son, and his ex-wife's gifts don't really matter. What she does shouldn't factor in what you do. You are the special lady in his life now.
Keep it personal and just between the two of you. That will make it all the more special. Trust me.
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A
male
reader, Fatherly Advice +, writes (11 June 2013):
 If it was mothers day the answer would be a big yes. If you like to show your love by giving presents, then this is a good opportunity. I'm the kind of guy who can't be bothered with fathers day, so I tend to think all guys feel the way I do. Don't do it to compete with the ex. The better way is for it to be an affirmation that you love him with his attachments. In other words, " you're a father and I like that about you."
FA
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (11 June 2013): "I'm pretty sure his ex wife will get some something for him from their son but should I do something too?"
I'd advise against it. At six months, his life as your boyfriend should still be independent of his life as a father. If he and his ex-wife are enlightened enough to be maintaining a cordial relationship as co-parents for the kids' benefit, then it would be unwise to do anything that could potentially cause friction and/or misinterpreted.
It is in your best interests to stay on good terms with baby mama, even if you haven't met, so best to play it safe and conservative until you are sure that this relationship has the potential to become permanent.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 June 2013): Since he is your b/f of just 6 months, and the son is not yours, DO SOMETHING nice...but not flashy or very special. Doing something little will show him that you accept him as a father and will always respect that relationship. He will feel nice and secure. But remember not to overdo it.
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