A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: My exboyfriend died 3 months ago in a tragic car accident. I loved him dearly but he did not know, he thought I hated him because of a lot of things he put me through. I have a problem. I still love my exboyfriend with all my heart, but I may be developoing feelings for his best friend. We both are still grieving his death but we have developed a crush on each other. Is this wrong? Should I walk away? I dont know what to do.
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best friend, crush, my ex Reply to this Question Share |
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 November 2007): I am sorry to hear about the death. If you want to go out with each other then i can see no wrong. If your ex really thought about you then i am sure that he would want you and his friend to be happy in the future. Just go for it and stop worrying about the past.
take care
xx
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 November 2007): don't worry I' was scared to date my dead ex's bff but I thought again, and decided that I love him he loves me why not, my ex is dead so I can't have him back and I should move on, so I did and now my life is almost as good as it was with my dead ex...
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A
female
reader, birdynumnums +, writes (16 November 2007):
Hi Dear,
I forgot a word. Your boyfriend would NOT want either you or his best friend to be unhappy forever. I'm quite sure if he is looking down at you both, he would approve. Sorry for the mistake in my answer. Best of luck to you both.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 November 2007): First of all let me give my condolences for you. It seems as if you really liked this guy, and then he goes and leaves you. look on it like that. are you religious? If so then you'll no he'll be watching you and respecting your decisions. If not, then I'm sure he'd understand should he be alive.
You clearly feel guilty for you're loss but you need to move on. You may see it has deciete but I believe you are simply moving forward. Don't jump in and make it meaningless. Sleep on it a couple of nights and if you still have feelings for this guy ask him for a drink or something. Take it easy so you don't regret, but Good Luck, I'm sure you'll do what's best.
Crawfy
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A
female
reader, rockelle +, writes (16 November 2007):
Many people who experience tragedy turn to friends for comfort and sometimes it does turn into a romantic relationship. I see nothing wrong with it. If this man makes you happy at a time like this then I say go for it. Just make sure you and him are really sure about pursuing anything other than a friendship. Hopefully you are not just trying to fill the emptiness that you feel with a familiar person. Losing a loved one is very hard, and I think that you should do what makes you happy.
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A
female
reader, birdynumnums +, writes (16 November 2007):
My sympathy to you for your loss. It is a tragedy that you lost someone you loved and at such a young age. I can't imagine how hard this has been for you both. It seems that this has drawn the two of you closer, and it would seem that it would be the most natural of responses, considering the fact that you both loved him and both of you need comfort right now. I'm sure that you are worried about guilty feelings out of respect for your ex, but he loved both of you too and he would want you be unhappy forever. The best advice that I can give is to give yourselves both time to heal and take this as slowly as possible so that you will have no regrets if you do decide to get together. Good Luck Dear.
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