A
male
age
,
anonymous
writes:I've started thinking a lot recently about an ex-girlfriend. The relationship ended 15 years ago and was a brief but very intense thing (i'm 44 now). I'm now considering contacting her (how are you, how's life going, nice kids etc etc), but am not sure a) as i I've found her address via the internet (frightening how easy it was). The thing is I'm not sure it's a good idea - 15 years is a long time even if it seems like yesterday - Any advice as to whether I should or shouldn't or opinions will be gratefully received.
View related questions:
ex girlfriend, the internet Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 January 2008): I am certain that she will be VERY flattered if you contact her. I don't see why not. I have had old guy friends and old flings contact me after several years of losing touch and I am always very flattered that they still think of me and still want to be my friend. So whatever your fear may be, do not fear that your call won't be appreciated. Cause I am sure it will be. The only thing is that she may have moved on and has other priorities, so don't expect a reconciliation, if that's what you hope for. It might just end up being a phone conversation and occasional emails from then on wishing you happy holidays and that's it.
But I say go for it. It's totally worth a shot and NO I do not find it creepy. You are like ALOT of guys. So go for it.
A
male
reader, Collaroy  +, writes (17 January 2008):
 Hi,
Only if you are both single. If she is not then all you are going to do is rekindle old feelings and disrupt her life. It seems pointless, you wouldn't contact her if she was just a mate, be honest, you are contacting her as you had a real intense connection and you now thinking about it as a period of your life which was very enjoyable. You are not contacting all your other old girlfriends are you? There is a reason why you are seeking out this girl, don't do this to her if she is married.
But if she's single why not, but ask yourself the question if she is in a relationship what are you really trying to achieve?
...............................
A
male
reader, emad khan  +, writes (17 January 2008):
 Sometimes I'm tempted to do the same... and I have actually... As long as theres no expectation involved, there is nothing wrong with the idea. Catch up with eachother. Its a fine idea. But I wouldn't have the intention of rekindeling an old flame. If it happens great, if not...after all she may even be married with kids.
So yeah...go for it!
Good luck
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 January 2008): Did you say she's got kids now? If she's married & has a family, I would say not to contact her. If not, or you're unsure, send a friendly letter, saying that you've been thinking of her, and tell her that you hope you haven't offended her by getting her address online, and that you'd love to hear back from her (send her your contact info.) but also state in the letter that you understand if she would rather not get back in contact for whatever reason. I say to tell her you got her address online because she is going to want to know where you got her address from.
...............................
|
