A
male
age
51-59,
*ad Love
writes:I am a married man of 8 years. The marriage has been OK but not great. Two years ago I started a new job. I met new people in this job and have established some wonderful friendships. One of the people I have met and built a friendship with is a lady that I admire very much. In fact, I have fallen in love with her. I have feelings for her that are stronger than feeling I have ever had for anyone else I have ever met. She is single and I am married. I am not looking to have an affair. That would not be fair to her or my wife.Should I confess to my friend that I love her? I think she may have sensed it already but I have never told her.I want to tell her but I don't know if it would be appropriate. However, I am afraid that the day will come where I will never see her again and I would regret that I never let her know. What should I do?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Bad Love +, writes (14 October 2010):
Bad Love is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWell thanks for the advice. It is not what I wanted to hear but I guess it is what I needed to hear. I will be seeing my friend, the lady I am in love with next week. I will keep my lips shut.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 October 2010): You need to work on your relationship with your wife. You only leave her as a last resort. That's why its for better or for worse. If there are not irreconcilable differences, then you're just being petty and selfish. Are there irreconcilable differences, or could both of you try harder? You need to be honest about this with yourself. Marriage takes work. You can't expect marriage, or anything else - like a car for example - to go the distance, without regular maintenance. Think about it.
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A
male
reader, slimfish  +, writes (9 October 2010):
 you can ask her how she feels about you, but dont tell her how you really fell unless you are prepared to leave you wife and take up with her.
its a really big step. i suggest you deal with your own marriage first, before you do something you will regret.
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (9 October 2010):
 What would telling her achieve if you have no intentions of doing anything about it?
I think its time to tell your self the truth, unless you already have and were hoping for some validation from the aunts here.
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A
female
reader, LLindy87 +, writes (9 October 2010):
 if you tell her then what? its not fair to tell her and still be with your wife and its not fair to your wife that you are going around telling other girls you love them.
I'd keep it to yourself if you plan on staying with your wife.
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