A
female
age
41-50,
*outherngirl3
writes:My boyfriend and I have been together for a year and two months. Back when we first started hanging out, I hooked up with a friend of mine. This was about two weeks into my boyfriend and I hanging out, so at that point, we were not anything, but simply, "hanging out." What happened with my friend and I was not planned, nor wanted. I regretted it after it happened, and of course, it never happened again. After this occurrence, I realized that I wanted more for myself than just an occasional hook up. My relationship with my now boyfriend started to grow, and we made our relationship official about two months after our first date. I basically forgot about that episode with my friend, until a few days ago when I was watching a movie with my boyfriend. There was a part where the girl confessed to her husband that after they had met, she hooked up with another guy. My boyfriend told me that he would have been pissed if I had done that, then asking me if I had. I told him no. Of course, I was taken back to what happened with my friend, and started to fee; guilty. My question is, should I feel guilty for what happened, and confess, or should it even matter, since at the time of the hookup, my boyfriend and I were only "hanging out" and there were no labels, and just forget about it? It's been eating at me, and I would like to know what others think. Thank you. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, southerngirl3 +, writes (26 August 2008):
southerngirl3 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the great advice, it's nice to know that there are people out there that are willing to take a moment and read about a person's drama and give their opinion of it! :) I am feeling better about the situation already, realizing that my relationship is wonderful and what happened before we made our relationship official doesn't matter, because that person is not in my life, and he is! Hope that everything in your lives is wonderful, and thanks again!
A
female
reader, Curiousbynature +, writes (25 August 2008):
Dont tell him, he'll never look at your the same. The past is the past, leave it there!! Trust me, from experience, dont tell him. No matter how many times he says its ok, it doesnt matter, bull... they never forget it. And they see it as cheating and that you were lying the whole time. Dont tell him..
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A
female
reader, uraqt9697 +, writes (25 August 2008):
Yes, I would sort of just let it go. Every relationship endures a bit of a transition phase before you decide where you want to go with it.
What you did is sort of like the information that does better not being known. Im sure he would be upset if he found out, but at the same time, you did nothing wrong. I would be a little upset and jealous if my boyfriend came to me w/that information, but I would rather not know because anything he's done is really not my business until after the point in which we became "official"
Dont sweat it, and ENJOY your relationship!
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