A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My ex-boyfriend and I were together for two years and we currently go to separate colleges, 6.5 hours away from each other. It's been a year since we broke up and I'm trying as it is to get out of this city. He's successfully done that because he actually paid attention in high school whereas I procrastinated and was too pre-occupied with my ex. So I ended up in the local community college.Anyways, I now have enough credits to transfer to a university in my homestate and my ex and I have been talking a lot lately and he wants me back. Says that I've changed; I'm not lazy or pathetic anymore. That I actually have ambition and that I'm not dependent on him anymore. All of this is true and I do want him back, but I see myself going to a different school. One that's actually an an hour and a half closer to him, but still (obviously) not the same school.Both schools have all the same majors (including the one I'm choosing) and all the same athletics and clubs (including the ones I'm joining). I know this question is going to sound so off but for some, it actually matters: Should I choose my potential future husband or the name of a school?
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ambition, broke up, my ex, university Reply to this Question
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female
reader, person12345 +, writes (21 December 2009):
 Won't it be showing him that in fact you haven't changed if you move? If you go to a school that's not as good as the one you want and things don't work out with this guy, then you might be ruining your future career! College seems like a REALLY long time, but it's not that long. I would advise that you go to the better school and try to visit each other. As it is, you two aren't officially dating yet, there's just a promise/longing. You say you'll be an hour and a half away, which is 5 hours. You could definitely visit each other on weekends. Think of your career. If you guys are really great together, you can survive this.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 December 2009): By the way you phrased the last sentence, you seem to be leaning toward the " future husband" over just a "name". An hour is not that far and will probably enable you to remain focused in school, which is your top priority ( or should be). Now that you're doing well, he wants to mosey his way back into your heart. Don't lose sight of what is really important simply because this guy comes back into your life. Don't follow a boy to a school unless it is truly where you want to go. You were dependent on him in high school and now you're setting aside what YOU want just to be in closer proximity to him. Trust me, an hour is hardly a nuisance.
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