A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:There is a female co-worker that i like. she is 17 and i am 19. we used to talk fairly regularly, but as i stopped putting as much effort into our friendship she has backed off and stopped talking to me altogether. she doesnt seem to miss talking to me. should i continue to try to bring our relationship up a level or should i just forget about it?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Dorothy Dix  +, writes (12 August 2011):
Hi. Another thing you could do, is to ask her out for coffee one day, and you need to make it clear to her that you are just friends.
The idea is to not scare her off.
A
female
reader, Dorothy Dix +, writes (6 August 2011):
Hi. Perhaps she's been in a recent relationship breakup and might be wary to get involved too soon.
All you can do in that case, is to be friendly towards her and see how things pan out over time.
It might be a fear of commitment on her part.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 August 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionwell she seems distant and doesnt always say hi anymore when she sees me at work. Also ive tried hanging out with her twice. She asked a group of people to see who wanted to come to a movie, and i was the only one who said yes and then she cancelled last minute. We were also going to go to a party together and I was bringing her her alcohol and she cancelled last minute on that also
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A
female
reader, Dorothy Dix +, writes (5 August 2011):
Hi there. As you were only ever talking casually to her before, she probably thought you were just being friendly.
If you do have some intentions of dating her, you do need to start talking to her again, otherwise you won't be able to get to the point of asking her out.
You will however, have to get her alone, to be able to talk in the way of suggesting a date.
Once you do get talking to her, see if she seems interested in you romantically, and if so, start by asking her out for a coffee one day. Then see how you get along together, and if you would like to ask her out on a formal date for dinner, in future.
But the number one priority to get to this point, is to start talking to her again. Don't delay it any longer.
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