A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi i found out my partner for 18 years was texing a blokes phone that she meet in work, she told me it was just texing anh had been going on for 5 months. now she does not going out at weekends to pubs our anything, only calls to her mothers , and goes walking after work. we have 2 kids 16 and 7 , it took her a few days to come clean as i had rang number and bloke answered it, she first said it was a girl in work. i told her i would forgive her no matter what and to come clean, as over 10 years i cheated on her and she forgave me.i keep thinking there was more then just texing , but she swore on my fathers garve and in the church that we are to get married in that nothing happend, and that she never even met him, just texing what should i believe, i told her it would be easier for me if she had slept with him as that way i wouldnt think she was lying. she still said not happend , and that he is now working in a new location nearly a 100 miles away
View related questions:
text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (23 March 2010):
THANKS FOR THE REPLYS
hi its me again i rang the bloke he said it was just texing as he lives over a hundred miles away, my partner works in a office , and he was courier that dropped off deliverys, the dont use this firm anymore, i spoke to her again and told her she still had time to come clean as i still would forgive, she still says nothing happend, and i said if i found out she was lying where finished. she said there is nothing to find out, it was just texing that got out of hand. the more i look it the more i believe her, the only time they could have met was lunch time ,and even at lunch time she would ring me from work most times as i use drop her to work most days and pick her up, our else she would drive ,and always home on time, thanks for your replys, we will just put it to bed, we both said it brought us closer than ever. its like we just met again, and planning to get married this year, and if anything i would thank the bloke, he made us both open our eyes to what we have, and what i took for granted and could have lost , So onwards and upwards .
A
female
reader, Entirely Unique  +, writes (21 March 2010):
 This is a woman you've been with for 18 years, you have children together, I don't think she's lying, you gave her the chance to ease her conscience and tell you the truth and made it clear you wouldn't leave either way so if she had of done something I'm pretty sure she would have confessed by then.
I think you should give her the benefit of the doubt, the texting has stopped, the bloke is gone miles away and she's there with you as before, I think you need to let it go as best as you can.
Truth will always out in the end so if she is lying you will find out eventually but I really don't think she is.
...............................
A
male
reader, rotarosca +, writes (21 March 2010):
Hello, I think you should trust her. You can ask her to reduce her texting. If he calls her, you should also ask that you would like to speak with him and just have a friendly chat with him. If he has ulterior motives,that will make him stop. You didnt say if he picked up the phone while she was at work. If he did, i think you should simply trust her. I think you are worried as you once cheated and you feel that she must have done the same. If she is unfaithful then signs will erupt again. Just trust her or you may end up losing her. All the best.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (21 March 2010): Your post is a little difficult to read. Something similar happened to me and it took a while to get to the truth of the matter. There were initial denials etc., but it all came out in the end. However, it was only going on for a few weeks and they never met.
I'm a bit confused by your post. She said she's never met him but in your first you said she met the guy at work......
My gut reaction is that if it's been going on for 5 months, there's definitely more to the story than she's telling you. When you're desperate, you'll swear anything to get out of the situation. In my wife's case, the guy had asked to meet her after only about a week and, I now know, that if it had continued, she would at least have met up with the guy shortly afterwards. She told me that herself.
I know that this sounds sneaky but, have you had a chance to peek at any of the texts to or from the other guy?
I hope I'm wrong but I have a bad feeling about what you've discovered. Good luck.
...............................
|
