A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Heyyyy!!I just want to know should I be mad @ my best friend if she told her mom ( which is whom we both work with ) that I don't have my diploma? I really really trying to get my GED ( for 2 years ) and I've known my best friend since the 10 grade ( we are both 19 ) but I just started working with her mom and step dad and I reall am happy that I have SOMETHING going good for me right now. Because I was just doing nothing for 2 years and I was really sad/hurt about it. But I was going to tell her mom, because I just took the last part of my GED test and I'm just real embarrassed about not having my GED, a job, no car, while everybody else around me was making moves and yes I was happy for them but I was just thinking "when will it be my turn?" And I told my best friend all of this. But she text me today telling me she told her mom that I didn't have it, and I texted her back saying that was mean and she said what it was the truth. And I said yea it was, but it was still mean and she text me back sayin whatever it wasn't. I didn't text her back because I was kind of upset. Even tho her mom said we have to sign up for school, in order to keep our jobs. Am I over-reacting? Or no? Do I have a rite to be mad a little?
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reader, anonymous, writes (28 September 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionOkay! Thanks for everybody's advice. We went to work, and I wasn't mad at her at all. I guess I was over reacting, sooooo Thanks to you all!!
:)
A
female
reader, maverick494 +, writes (27 September 2010):
No need to get crabby about it, OP. I give advice and you take from it what you can use, ignore what you can't. Simple as that. I also explicitly said that this wasn't a jab at you.
If the communication between you and your friend really is as clear as you imply, you wouldn't be asking this question in the first place. The whole "she probably can guess she shouldn't pass that on" doesn't work all the time, not even between the best of friends.
Just be clear next time. She can't read your mind. She probably thought this was okay to discuss with her family, based on her own judgment. When that differs from your own you've got a problem.
So don't leave anything to chance. You could be angry with her if that makes you feel better. In truth, you're probably as 'guilty' as she is. So why not shake hands and plan to do it differently next time?
Lastly, good luck with getting your GED! It doesn't matter that you're taking longer than intended. The effort is there and that's what counts.
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A
female
reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (27 September 2010):
I don't think you should continue to be mad at her. She did just tell the truth and she told it to her Mom. Personally, I tell my Mom practically everything... that's what Mom's are for. And I'm sure that her Mom is proud that you're working towards your GED. That's all that matters, not what you've done before but what you're doing now. And right now, you've got a job and you're finishing up. That's something to be proud of!
I don't think your friend was trying to be vindictive or mean when she told her mother. So, while it's okay to tell her that she hurt your feelings, I don't think you should hold this mistake against her.
Good luck!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 September 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI got on this website for advice on what I asked, NOT about my writing!! So next time, keep that to yourself. And me and my best friend know not to tell our secrets so I don't have to tell her not to say anything.
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A
female
reader, maverick494 +, writes (27 September 2010):
When you give your friends information that you don't want to be shared, you have to make that clear to them. I sometimes also discuss my friend's problems with my parents, in hopes of getting new advice that I can pass on to them. BUT only when she tells me I don't have to keep it for myself.
From what you've written I gather you have not made it clear. Maybe she should have exercised better judgment, but other than that you are the one to blame because you haven't been clear.
Also, just a note (not a jab, mind you) you should try to write in full sentences and words because watered down versions like "rite" make you sound much less mature than you are. It also allows for bad habits to creep into your language skills. Do yourself a favor and stop doing that so you won't have trouble with it in the future like so many other people do.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty +, writes (27 September 2010):
Yes i guess you can be a little mad and hurt that your friend broke your trust, but its a hard situation as it was her mother she told and mother and daughter bonds can be very strong maybe she felt she had to be honest with her own mother, so i dont think you should fall out with her over this.
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