A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:So I have been with my girlfriend for 10 years and engaged for a couple years now. Recently things have changed her personality she's bitchy and nasty then other times it's how things used to be. She still says I love you and kisses me good bye. The thing is lately she is taking her phone everywhere with her the bathroom , shower, when she goes to sleep she puts it under the blanket and she's always on social media and totally ignores me. Should I be concerned in my gut I feel like she's trying to hide something from me but I don't know what to do or say?
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 March 2016): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWe've been engaged for 3 years and our daughter got sick with leukemia so we haven't really had the time to move forward with the wedding right now
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (25 March 2016):
 I have to ask, why be with someone for 10 years and be engaged THAT long? Why hasn't the relationship progressed?
My advice, TRY and mimic her for a week or two. Do the same with your phone and see how she reacts.
If she accuses you, then she probably is up to no good. I say that because she will instinctively think you are hiding it for the SAME reason SHE is.
If she doesn't seem to notice after a couple of weeks, then I'd ask her straight out.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (24 March 2016):
 If you have a gut feeling that she is hiding something well then talk to her and tell her how you feel. Don't demand to see her phone, because we are all entitled to our privacy. If you feel ignored well then tell her, if you feel she is being secretive tell her. You need to be able to talk to her or else this will only escalate more. You are engaged to be married so am sure at this point you can talk to each other about anything.
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A
male
reader, Garbo +, writes (24 March 2016):
 If this was me I would ask her to show me the phone. If she has nothing to hide then she will not hide. And if she hides then why would she? I think transparency is in order with committed couples. It is up to couples to reassure one another on issues of trust so, therefore, she should assure you with a simple transparency about her phone.
On the other hand, in case you find out the bad stuff, be prepared to deal with the gut wrench.
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