A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi Guys,Well where do I start, in My local cafe there is a beautiful girl who i used to see with her dad when she was in for a drink sometimes and when I went in today I found she has started working there, well to describe her she is simply one of the most nicest looking girls I have seen, she is slim, brunette well tanned and around 5'7 in height with blonde highlights in her hair. sorta my dream girl. well anyway I went in today and the cafe was really busy because of it being market day and loads of people were pushing in and she was trying to get past and I stopped people and let her get past and she smiled and said thanxs and at the moment the attraction to her grew more. But i know I wudn't stand a chance with her coz she's everything and I'm tall, slim and pale! and I reeli do like her but have no idea whether I should attempt to talk to her properly or not!?!some help please? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (30 July 2007): Go for it, nothing ventured, nothing gained ... took me 25 years to work that one out ... could ask her out for a coffe???
A
male
reader, DrCynic  +, writes (12 April 2007):
 Go for it my man!... Just because your skinny and pale doesn't mean you shouldn't ever try to hit a home run. I'm kinda short, really fat, and pale... I struck out alot, even with girls I was friends with... Then I found my dream girl. If she's your dream, allow me to paraphrase a quote I heard long ago:
"Get a dream, hold onto it, and shoot for the sky!"
Be casual, be friendly, be yourself... Ask her to maybe a trip to a mall if you're not one for coffee... Maybe a movie... If she says no thank you, don't let rejection show... Just say ok, and ask if you could be friends at least.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 April 2007): Girls are constantly waiting for guys to ask them out, we want you to make the first move....if she works in a cafe, then ask her when she gets off if she would like to take a walk with you, or go to the circus or what ever activity you can think of where you can actually talk to each other.
Introduce yourself the next time you go into the cafe, and think of something funny to comment on, or give her a compliment and see how she reacts.....you may be pleasantly surprised....Please stop thinking that you aren't good enough looking, looks are not the only thing people want, there has to be something there besides that, so just chat her up and see what you think....you don't really know her yet either, so try to get past her looks.
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A
male
reader, Zim +, writes (12 April 2007):
 Well, if you both went to the same local cafe for quite a while there's a very good chance of her knowing you, at least by face. This is a good thing. It will help with the initial trust thing. It's obvious that you like this girl very much so I would say take the plunge and go for it!
There's one way I can suggest. You can introduce yourself at the till or when she comes to your table (I don't know what she does in the cafe) and then say something along the following:
"I don't want to seem too forward, but I was wondering if you'd like to have a coffee sometime?"
If you're shy and nervous, don't worry! It'll actually make it better. Asking someone out for a coffee is the nearly foolproof way to ask someone out on a date.
If she declines, then say something along the lines of "Well, at least I know now. Thank you". That's just a suggestion for an easy way out.
If on the other hand, you want to start by being her friend and then moving things on later, then talk to her at every opportunity. You know the things to ask, such as what school/uni do you go to, what sports etc. Compliment her too. Since she's likely to recognise you from the cafe, it should be quite easy to strike up a conversation. You'll be nervous, I understand, i'm still like that now:-), but the only way to get past it is by doing it. Good Luck! Let us know how it goes!
ZIM
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