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age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: My friend has changed ever since we graduated from college. She used to be very outgoing and cheerful, but she seemed to become more quiet and reserved. Though we had always made fun of girls who were obsessed with boys and caught up in their looks, she became like one of them. She started liking this guy who was a total player. (He asked out every one of the girls in their group!) Eventually after 3 years of knowing each other, she said she "finally gave in" and went out with him. It didn't last long since he was seeing another girl. I tried to warn her, but she just accused me of being jealous. In high school she was geeky, so maybe she is just overcompensating now or something.Now she's obsessed with dating and seems so desperate to get married. All of the girls in her group are married, so she feels like she has to be married too or something. I went out to dinner with her and she looks sooo thin now, like half of what she used to look like. We only talk now and then, but obviously there's something going on. I tried to talk to her but she just gets defensive and shuts down. Is she going through a quarter life crisis or something?
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female
reader, DiamondGirlx  +, writes (18 August 2010):
 I think you might be right... as you mentioned maybe she feels that this is chance for her to be in the 'cool' crowd , i know it sounds wierd for someone in there 20's but , i think she might feel she has to fit in with everyone else from her group.. as shes trying her hardest to do so, but the truth is theres only so much you can actually say or do, i know your worried about her, but if shes getting defensive and shutting you out then if you carry on asking she'll only just drift further away, she might still be hurt that , that guy cheated on her and thats why shes trying to get over it by dating loads x
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