A
male
age
41-50,
*mptyinside2014
writes:I've no idea what to do? I feel like I've tried everything. I met a girl years ago who I thought was the woman of my dreams. She's beautiful, and she's been successful in life. I discovered she was cheating and as a result we split up. For the past 2 years she's pretty much made my life a living hell. We tried to reconcile, but she was still cheating. She's had me beaten up now on 3 separate occasions. And I have now just lost my job as a result of what has been going on outside work. And this is the sad part. I've tried to move on. I've not spoken to her once since the last time I was beaten up in October. But I can't stop loving her. I don't want to be with her anymore. I've tried to forget her. I'm a good looking guy and have been asked out many times in the past 2 years but when it has come to the date I've cancelled at the last minute. I just don't want to be with anyone else. I've never felt like this about anyone. I mean this girl has treated me so bad but still I love her. I know I shouldn't and should never have allowed myself to be treated like this. But what do I do. She still contacts me all the time but I have ignored her. I've even thought about moving away just to get away from her. Any suggestions?
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male
reader, Darrell Goodliffe +, writes (28 December 2013):
 I think intrigued may have a point - this is well beyond the conventional so it may be time to go out of the box on this one. You are addicted, shes an addictive person, this is what I mean when I say I dont think your in love, your hooked, and although they feel similar, they arent the same, you will have to go outside the box with this one.
A
female
reader, Intrigued3000  +, writes (28 December 2013):
 I'm going to suggest something a bit unorthodox here, but maybe you should try a combination of therapy and hypnosis to get to the root cause of your addiction to her. It sounds like you're trying to beat an addiction.
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A
male
reader, Darrell Goodliffe +, writes (28 December 2013):
Maybe move if you think it will help but be aware if shes as determined as I think she is she will probably find you and make contact again. She isnt contacting you because she wants back with you, shes contacting you to keep you on a leash, to stop you moving on with somebody else so cut the leash, and start forming attachments with other girls and go on dates. In other words, start living your life again.
Her hold on you is totally unhealthy and it needs to be broken. She is a totally negative influence on your life and the only way to break this is to sever the connection you have with her. If shes having you beaten up and you can prove it, you might also want to think about involving the relevant authorities, even if you cant connect it to her then you can at least get to the people shes manipulating into doing this.
Finally, I know you think you are in love but I think this is a different kind of attachment. Your username is emptyinside, love doesnt leave you empty inside.
Good luck.
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