A
male
age
51-59,
*osgate
writes:I have a very good female friend who I see weekly. We are both married. A couple of months back I went to see her at her home and when we greeted she got more of my lips than my cheek. I dismissed it as simply a kiss between friends. Recently I lost my job and she has been very supportive. While speaking on the phone she said that I don't know how much "affection" she has for me. She went on to say that there isn't anything I could say to her that would offend her. I changed the subject and that was the end of that. The other day we got together for lunch and when she dropped me off at my home we embraced and kiss each other goodbye and again I got more lip than cheek. I'm I just being silly and reading too much into this? Or, is she trying to tell me something more? I usually do not throw the word affection around unless I was refering to my wife and if I knew another man used that word to my wife I would be upset. My friendship is important with this young lady. What should I do?J Reply to this Question
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female
reader, AskEve  +, writes (6 March 2007):
 Yes, I agree, that does tell you she has feelings for you. It sounds more like a "goodbye" hug to me. She knows she's maybe came on too strong in the past and she knows now what she has to do. Jogging to the car, she'd have been upset and just wanted to get away. Hopefully she'll now get the message. Keep us informed!
Eve
A
male
reader, Fosgate +, writes (6 March 2007):
Fosgate is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHere is an update. Yesterday we met for drinks and I told her of my concerns and she assured me that her feelings are friendly in nature. That made me feel better. But, while going back to our cars she and I embraced and she gave me a kiss in the cheek but she wrapped her arms around my neck and held my embrace quite strongly for a moment before saying goodnight. She than briskly jogged to her car. I feel like the kiss was replaced with a hug. My vibes say she does have feelings. Am I wrong?
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A
female
reader, AskEve +, writes (25 February 2007):
If you feel you are in control of the situation then there's no harm in meeting with her but if you're not 100 per cent sure about how you feel about her ie platonic friend only then I would put a bit of space between you both for now.
Eve
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A
male
reader, Fosgate +, writes (25 February 2007):
Fosgate is verified as being by the original poster of the questionTo answer your question, I see this woman every week because we are part of team so we get together once a week. My wife is very aware of her and likes her as a person but does not see her as often as I do.To give you guys an update, I originally wasn't going to see her this week but she called my cell to tell me that she is going to see if she can make it back to our area by the time my game ends if I am interested in getting together afterwards.
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A
female
reader, AskEve +, writes (24 February 2007):
You put her firmly in her place that's what you do! Tell her you like her as a friend but nothing more. You love your wife and value your marriage and have no intentions of having anything more than a platonic friendship with her.
Does your wife know you see this "good friend" every week? Does she not mind? Be very careful with this friend, you're playing with fire here, women can use their seductive powers very well to get what they want, just be aware of that and don't succumb to it. And if she kisses you like that again.... pull away or you might just get burned!
Eve
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A
female
reader, me616 +, writes (24 February 2007):
I think that she is developing feelings for you and the right thing would be to tell her how yo are just great friends and it can't be more than that. She'll understand if she's yor real friend.
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A
female
reader, Carina  +, writes (24 February 2007):
 I don't think you're reading too much into this. You've obviously picked on something that has changed in your relationship with your friend and it may be that she's developed stronger feelings for you. It could also be that she's feeling especially caring because of you losing your job. I think the best thing would be to talk to her about how much you love your wife and make sure from your conversation that your friend knows you consider her a good friend, but that is all. Ask her about her feelings for her husband if you can and emphasise your belief in a faithful marriage and that kind of thing. Hopefully, if she HAS been hoping for more, she will realise that it's not on the agenda at all. It would be a shame to lose a good friendship because of this. However, if she persists or if you start to feel very uncomfortable I think you will have to confront her with your suspicions and see what she has to say. I hope it works out for you.
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