A
male
age
30-35,
*ashington
writes: Ok I'm pretty old to have just lost my virginity which was only a few months ago. I wanted it to be with someone really special but it wasn't. A month after that happened I met a girl who I really wanted to lose it with. She tells me that she's a virgin but I'm not so sure. She dated someone for over a year and she has finally let me finger her once and also suck her nipple once. She's a really nice girl but I'm afraid she's not telling me the truth about her virginity. she is 16 and really smart and she seems very mature. She looks and acts much older. I swear I won't lose respect for her if she isn't a virgin but I'll be really upset if I find out she lied. Is she probably not really a virgin?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (31 January 2010): my best friend was dating her best friend and my friend and I went out of town for a month to work. When we came home I found out his girlfriend was cheating on him with a guy who I thought was a very good friend of mine. He and I were talking about the girls we were both seeing and I showed him a picture of my girlfriend. His jaw dropped open and he told me he was sleeping with her friend. He told me my girlfriend had been over at his place with her friend and that she had just danced with a guy at his place. When I asked my girlfriend about it she told me she just danced with him and that's it. I'm pretty upset and confused because I just can't see her just dancing with the guy in an apartment with only four people there(my friend, my friend's now exgirlfriend, my now ex girlfriend and some other dude). I wrote her all the time I was gone because I didn't have access to a computer or even a phone and she only wrote me three times. When I came home she didn't even come to see me and when she did she seemed really weird. I feel like an idiot because I felt like I truly loved her but now I feel like she has just played me for a fool. I don't even know who she really is. I just can't believe that I could trust someone so completely and that she could tell me she was saving herself for me but I believe that she has slept with this guy. Now I don't even now the truth as to why she broke up with me. I didn't even accuse her of sleeping with the guy I just asked her about it. She didn't even give me an explanation as to why she broke up with me. As for my friend who was cheating with my best friends girl we are not speaking. I think he really knew how important she was to me and should have told me what was really going on. I can't tell anyone this but the truth is that I really wasn't ready to lose my virginty to the other girl before I met my exgirlfriend. Sex means more to me than just having fun. I have to really care about someone. If I told any of my friends that they would just laugh at me. I am really heartbroken because I am just wondering what happened and she won't even say she's sorry.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 January 2010): So why exactly don't you trust her? Is it because she was in a long-term relationship before? Because she seems very mature? Or because she let you finger her? All those things together don't make a reason enough not to trust her.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (30 January 2010):
Who knows? Only she knows, and she says she is. If you don't believe her, or can't trust her, then she's just not the girl for you. Everyone has a past. Maybe she has had sex, but doesn't' want to say because she'll feel you'll react badly, as you seem to be now. If she's a great girl, then that's all that matters.
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