A
female
age
30-35,
*izz.butterflies
writes:So,In my senior year of high school i was friends with this very nice girl.She was dating a guy,and this guy was my then boyfriend's best friend so we all hung out together.we used to spend much one-on-one time too. I invited her to my summer house that summer. We had a nice time. She left to go back to the city,and because i was still at my vacation house,she started hanging out with some people,and especially this one girl i didnt like.(i had drama with her in the past).When I got back to the city two weeks later,my friend was acting as if she and that girl i didnt like were best friends.That pissed me off but we didnt have a fight. I left to go abroad to study.Within my freshman year,my friend emailed me and apologized,she said i was right about that girl,bla bla bla she wanted to make amends.I went home for christmas during my sophomore year,so me and her went out for a coffee to catch up. She had changed. She started smoking,etc.But She was still the smart girl I met.Half a year later,I told her I will be transfering to our home country,and particualry to the city she goes to college to. She said she cant wait for me to come,she will show me all the places.I thought that its nice to have someone i know....don't forget,i lived my life and all the friends i've made during the 2 years i was abroad.So i come to this city,and we get to hang out after like 2 months i got here,i went to her place,she opened up to me and i did too,so i was almost certain we'd start hanging out again. This never happened. Today I got a message on facebook from her saying "Hey girl,where have you been??? Call me sometime i wanna talk to you about this biiiiiiig favor i want you to do me"I got upset when I read this.Not only she hasnt kept in touch in so long,and wasnt there for me when i was All by myself in a new city when me and her were bestfriends..she has the nerve to ask me to call her.I dont have her number. I dont know if i should ask her to call me so I can tell her everything I just told you,or just say it to her in a message. Which way would be the best and why?-Maybe let her call me then hear the favor she wants and then let her know that her behavior is unacceptable?Tell her everything in a message ? HRmmThanks!P.S She's a good girl,but yeah,she did do me wrong.Funny thing?I was thinking about her today...that maybe i should drop her a line or something. Crazy right?!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 May 2010): First off, we have to stop labeling people as "good" when they do wrong towards us. Any person that continues to hurt you time and time again is NOT a "good" person. Just b/c they are smart, beautiful or may do "good" things from time to time doesn't make them "good" on a entire scale. It's more like she is using you and I hope you stand for it. Just tell her in a polite and calm way how you feel and that you will not stand by and be used. See what happens from that point on.
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