She wants a break. Should I just not talk to her for a bit and maybe she'll miss me and realize, I am the one for her? Any advice?

A male age 36-40, *akebank writes:

Ok well my girlfriend and I had been together for 2 and half years. When we first got together her boyfriend previous to me had died in a freak accident. Immediately she became attached to me. After dating for about two months she showed interest in another guy, and blew me off a few times to hang out with him, but nothing ever happened and things went back to normal about two weeks later. Well circumstances arose where we had to go to different colleges. During this time I had heard that she got drunk and messed around with another guy. After being broke up for a bit I took her back because i knew she was sincere in her feelings for me and her apology. Anyways that was about a year ago. So this school year im back at this school and she is home which is about two hours away. Lately I'd had a lot of stress in my life because of baseball (im a college athlete). During this time I took some things out on her. I never meant to and I apologized every time. Because of this she said that she felt like I was pushing her away. Even though that couldnt have been further from the case. Well she has been hanging out with female friend of hers who has a boyfriend. Well the boyfriend has a friend who had been her shoulder to cry on during these times that we fought a little. The kid couldnt be more different from me. He is 5'9 and skinny, and im 6'5 and thick. He is 24 and me and my gf are 19. He is saying all the right things to her and being really sweet, so she developed feelings for him. All he has to do is listen to her and she says what im doing wrong, so he wont make a mistake, he knows exactly what to do. So she broke up with me the other day, saying that she wants some time to be her. I struggled really hard with this because I love her so much and we even were talking about marriage. There was a time when all she wanted in life was to be with me. I think that maybe she'll realize that this kid is a sort of dead end because he is 24 and a bug exterminator. Im on the right track in life and have a lot going for me, where this kid is not. He has his own place and I know she likes that because he father is emotionally and mentally abusive and she wants to get out of her house. She told me that she still has feelings for me and at first she just wanted a break. I said no its all or nothing. I regret saying that because I would have been ok with the break. I even told her that later on and she said thats shes not sure that is what she wants now. I know that there are still feelings there for me. I want to make it work. Im stuck at school for three more weeks so its not like there is a lot I can do. What should I do? I haven't talked to her in two days because I felt like I was driving her nuts. Should I just not talk to her for a bit and maybe she'll miss me and realize? Any advice. Im trying to get over her but im struggling really bad with it. She has never been the real jealous type so I dont know if thatll work. Please any help would be appreciated.

View related questions: a break, broke up, drunk, has a boyfriend, jealous

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A male reader, jakebank  +, writes (22 April 2007):

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