A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I started dating a person in August of last year. We had a wonderful time together. However, she had an ex that she still loved. By Christmas, I was head over heals. Then he came back in town and poof, they were together. Now that he has gone home again, I see that she only wants to be friends. However, she does act a bit like she wants more at times. I gave up and started to act as if I did not care, and really do not speak with all that much. There is a gentleman at her work (she is a bartender), that she befriended. She says it is totally innocent, yet I have my doubts. She treats him the same way she did me when we first started dating. This morning I saw his car at her house. She said that he and the rest of her roomates all watched a movie after work and nothing happened. I have a hard time believing that, and as such, told her to never contact me again. How can I trust her? She has maintained that there is nothing going on, and has for a month now. Help
View related questions:
christmas Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 January 2009): Her heart is still with her ex, whether they did anything or not, she doesn't have anything to give you. Sorry, I know it's hard, but leave this woman alone, she can't give you the love you need and she will only confuse you. Sorry.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 January 2009): I would say that you are probably 100% correct. If you think she is a cheating, lying person, then she is. Use this power to know that you are doing the right thing. Leave her alone!!
...............................
A
male
reader, UndecidedPrude +, writes (27 January 2009):
You did the right thing telling her not to contact you. Not that she is lying but because you obviously desire the relationship to be on a level that she is not willing to consent to. Believe me; the trust thing doesn't get better with the age of the relationship. The longer it goes on the more you will find to mistrust. Don't give in to the temptation to stock her and ask about people staying at her house. This is unhealthy and ends up hurting you and her. You have reasons why you don’t trusting her. She seems to have given you the idea that you were in a relationship, but dropped you at the first sign of the next best thing. That isn't a foundation for a real, caring, healthy, and trusting relationship. If you cannot be "just friends" with her, it looks like you have nowhere to go with this. Before you trick yourself into believing you can, make a promise to yourself that you will be honest. Lying doesn't help make it real.
...............................
|
