A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Is this considered cheating?My friend and his girlfriend were going through a tough time, and decided to take a break...the break literally lasted a day and they were back hugging and kissing and everything...then one late night, she looks at him and tells him "i love you so much, you mean the world to me and i can't live without you." the very next day a guy asks her to go to dinner, the boyfriend approves cause he trusts her and loves her, she then tells him later that after dinner they went back to her place and made out...she says technically its not cheating cause they were on a break and never "formally" got back together, he feels she did cause of what she said and how they acted together...Is it cheating or is it not? I just want the right thing for my friend, i've tried lookin at it from both ways but am confused...thanks!!
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a break, got back together, kissing Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, chlez83  +, writes (20 February 2008):
Boy are girls so manipulative these days.She thinks she can have best of both worlds.Keep your friend interested while she goes out with other guys.It seems like girls of these days are really something.Look she's using her charm on your friend and if you really care about your friend,you should help him get off the spell she's put him under.It'll be ok if you all say it's ok and i guess she doesn't want you guys to think realistically.
Good Luck.
A
female
reader, hlskitten  +, writes (20 February 2008):
 I wouldnt be interested anymore in someone who claimed to love me, but within a day, jumped in the sack with someone else. Break or definate split thinking you wouldnt get back together. Thats not love in my book. Thats getting over someone extreeeeeeeemely quick!
But thats just me.
C xxxxx
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 February 2008): What a load of rubbish! One day and she hops off with someone else. Is this a joke questions?
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A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (20 February 2008):
 She feels technically she is right as she makes her own rules.She is not married to him nor have any contracts.
Morally , she is in the wrong . You can interpret anyway you want but she did slept with another guy. That is a fact you cannot change.
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A
male
reader, Dazzerg +, writes (20 February 2008):
 Yes and no. Now on other break questions i've said that getting with somebody on a break isn't cheating but this case is different. She behaved in a manner where it was reasonable for him to assume that they were back together. Sooooo although she maybe 'technically' correct in that they were on a break and she didn't cheat; what she says goes against the spirit of the thing so while she may not have 'technically' cheated she did lead him on and he is entitled to be angry about that. He is not being unreasonable and she needs to recognise that; not get hung-up on formalities.
No doubt this is why he feels unfairly done by because he feels there was an unspoken agreement that they were back on. She should not have behaved as intimately as she did if they were still on a break, it's called having your cake and eating it, but you may want to suggest to him that since this is such a tangle and there is no clear-cut case either way here he may well want to consider not throwing this relationship away over this.
In an ideal world she would say sorry for any confusion and heartache she caused and he would forgive her but sadly we don't live in an ideal world. Good luck :)
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