A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:i am 17 and i was with my girl friend for 2 years but we have been friends for about 6 or more years since primary school. this is the girls that i had the little crush on back in primary school and that continued till high school were she had a bf for a little over 2 years also and when they broke up i was there for her didn't move to fast it just happned well yeah we were together 2 years she lived with me my mum fort of her as a child and we had big fights tho due to she would lie but i understood that and alway forgave her cuase none of them were to bad but then we broke up well it was actually a break kinda its confusing well we were still together everyday after it still spent every night together but then one day she said she was going to a friends house i was sus on it plus she had just written me a letter explaining how much she loves me how there will never be anyone else etc and i bought her a really not cheep necklace and told her this is so she knows ill always be here well she went to her Friends and i tried calling her the entire weekend and no answers then when we finally did speak she told me she didn't answer cause she wanted a week end apart i fort fair enough but i knew she was with a guy like i could just tell so i asked her and of course she denied it so then the next weekend she went to her "friends" again this time i new it was bullshit and i rang and we were fighting then eventually a guy answers and i could tell it was some one that knew me judging by how he was talking to me then the next day i said i would work things out with her if she just told me the truth i was lying fir once as i knew the only way to get the truth out of her was this way and she had finally told me that she was rooting this random guy we went to school with who was 2 grades above us who never looked twice at her spoke to her nothing apparently she had a crush on him about 5 years ago and what i don't understand is why they were together as they wouldn't just be catching up as they weren't friends but i turns out the day she rote me the letter and i gave her the necklace is was a couple hours after that that she was on msn and said wanna catch up went to his and rooted him after seeing and kissing me just a couple hours before and what i wanna know is should i forgive her she begged for me back the night after and i refused and now its been 3 months and we spoke and i asked if she had been with anyone since him of course she said no but then i asked her friend and apparently she goes out to clubs now and just roots randoms so i told her if she told me how many people she has slept with i would consider working it out but she refuses and says its irrelevant and i shouldn't need to know if i really want her back it shouldn't matter how many people she has slept with? is this true its just hard to image her doing this cause i was her first she didn't even root her bf of 2 years befor me cause she wasn't ready now she will just jump into bed with anyone for no reason i treated her so good let her live hear for free everything well sorry about the long story i just need help if any one has advice i would be very grateful?? joel
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a break, broke up, crush, kissing, msn Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (6 May 2009): break up with her. if she's sleeping around on here then she's the one that doesn't love you. Move on. You deserve better.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 April 2009): Wait...she rooted a guy behind your back? That is obviously a form of cheating...tell her, to get hell away from you and find someone worth pursuing...you deserve way better
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A
female
reader, JustMeINFJ  +, writes (12 April 2009):
You are both young. She doesn't seem capable of commitment at this time. She is avoiding answering your question as to how many people she has slept with. It is not true that if you really wanted her back it wouldn't matter how many. It is a fair question -- the answer would likely open your eyes as to who she really is... and she knows you wouldn't want her if you knew the answer. Bad news kiddo. If she doesn't change her ways, and you two get together, you will end up having to pay the price -- not your Mum (like when she lived with your family).
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 April 2009): Sounds like you got a promiscuous girl on your hands. Well, how many she has slept with since the breakup shouldn't technically matter all that much, because you weren't together. But what should and does matter, is she "rooted" a guy right after she said there will never be anyone else, and you gave her a necklace saying you will always be there.That's troubling. It means she has a nature of duplicity. It means you will never really know if she is telling the truth. If you do get back with her, how will you trust her?Granted, I'm one who believes in second chances, I do, but that's where her after breakup behavior actually does start to matter in deciding whether to forgive.Was she contrite? apologetic? Does her behavior of slamming any dude that looks her way indicate she is ready at all for monogamy? It's up to you, you know your situation best.
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