A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:ok here's the deal, I'm 44 years old divorced with kids. I have a friend, she's 36 and she's still a virgin and she doesn't have a boyfriend and hasn't for a few years, I think ever since she was about 26. This is one of my best friends. A lot of people think she might be lesbian. I'm really not sure, I haven't seen anything that tells me she is. So, I've been observing since peoople keep on saying this. She says she is not. I'll tell you a few situations and maybe there's somebody out there that is lesbian and will be able to tell me something. Well, we hang out like friends all the time. She has had opportunities to have intercourse but she has decided not to right at that time she backs up. Last time we both liked the same guy, I noticed that she was rushing to win his attention, she was going to lunch with him and the group (with she never does or maybe once or twice) and also rushed to ask him out for dinner at night. She knew very very well that this guy liked me a lot and so did I. So, she didn't tell me that she was planning to out to dinners withhim until the next day. She even slept over at this hotel room, but supoosedly didn't have sex. She did say that he was very interested in knowing more about me and was asking questions and she told him, "are we going to talk about other people, or us here right now?" Anyway she has mentioned that she is not lesbian, last weekend, we went to a karaokee bar and met this guys, they were kinda cute and gave us their bizz card. Well, after hat her and I went to breakfast and she asked me " do you really like that guy?, will you date him? and she also asked if I liked another guy that was also there. Then I noticed the ripped the bizz card into little pieces. Hmm I'm not sure. Is just that she never wants to have sex and she has also mentioned that she doesn't feel anything when she's with a man. But she says she's not lesbian.....
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female
reader, _Katy_Did_ +, writes (10 March 2010):
 Ok, this may or may not be what's going on here.-She is a lesbian and has feelings for you.-She is getting these other guys out of the way so that they can't date you. This would make her jealous. -She doesn't want to tell you she's a lesbian because she is either afraid to come out of the closet or worried she'll scare you away as a friend and lose you all together. That is just what I suspect. It's not a problem other than her jealous behavior will make it very difficult for you to have a boyfriend. I suggest you ask her why she has been behaving the way she is and ask her to stop.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 March 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI don't care if she is lesbian or not but its kinda weird that she gets in the middle when there is a guy that I like. The last time, I met this guy that I liked and she kinda rushed to get him. She did everything she could to be with him. She went with him to his hotel and this took him away from me. When she knew that he liked me a lot and I also liked him a lot.
I just don't want her interfering in my love life. That's why I'm trying to figure out why a close friend of mine will flirt and go with the guy that I like.
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A
female
reader, veronika  +, writes (9 March 2010):
 Why do you care about what her sexuality is? That is what was going through my mind while reading this.
If she says she's not a lesbian, then you should just take her word for it. Not only does it not matter, she probably has reasons for why she hasn't had sex or for why she doesn't "feel anything" with a man. It doesn't have to mean she's a lesbian.
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