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male
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anonymous
writes: i don't know what on earth to do right now. my "best friend" and i have been friends for a while now. but back a few months ago, she confessed her feelings for me and told me she wanted to be with me and leave her partner. we wound up hooking up, but she later went back to her partner and told me that she made a mistake. it hurt REALLY bad, but i properly dealt with it and moved on. but i was still pretty angry at what she did to me. anyway, time went on, and we began to get back to normal and everything was fine. but then, just last week, she told me that she'd fallen in love with me. i was completely taken aback. and initially, i was hesitant, remembering what she did to me last time. but since i like her, i couldn't help but get caught up in it. and since then, we'd been spending a lot of time together. but just yesterday, she informed me that she thinks she made a mistake again, and mistook her feelings for me, saying that i was only her friend, and that she didn't really love me. so this time, i put my foot down and told her that she was really hurting me and i couldn't allow her to make me feel this way anymore because i like her too much. and if nothing was going to come of us, i needed to be away from her to properly get rid of my feelings. i told her i thought it was awful the way she throws around her emotions, especially love, with no regard for how anyone else feels. but now she's angry with me. anyway, what do you think is going on with this girl? is she just manipulating me in order to keep me around? how should i procede from here? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Lostandalone  +, writes (12 September 2006):
 What do you mean "how should I proceed from here?" You're doing fine right now. You told her how you felt. The only thing left for you to do is stick to your guns. This behaviour of hers is totally unacceptable and should be addressed and thats what you did. Walk away. You don't need friends nor girlfriends with this type of demeanor. Good Job. Just stick to it. Good Luck.
A
female
reader, theskycastle +, writes (12 September 2006):
 She is definitely selfish. Since I'm not exactly sure why, my guess is she wants you to be with her when she feels like it. For example, when her boyfriend treats her badly, maybe she's using you to make him jealous. Maybe she's using you so she will never feel alone when she's single. I feel she treats you like a back-up. And quite sorry, this is not love. If you love someone, you won't use them.
Of course, you can't control what she does next time. So my advice is: don't fell for her again. Think about it as a trap. If she's serious about building a relationship with you, you will feel it with your heart. Telling you she has feelings for you is not enough. But honestly, I don't think it's a good idea for you to date her in the future as this unpleasant memory will be always be remembered.
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