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male
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*ammy2006
writes: Ive come to Singapore from the uk and life is very different here, especially relationships! I am 23 and met a girl of 25, things were great as friends but I have some how given the impression our friendship is much more even though nothing (not even a kiss) has happened! Now I find myself bessotted by her 22yr old friend and the best part of my day is seeing this other girl for the few minutes when she leaves the house! The 22yr old has told my 25yr old friend she fancies me but I havent told her that im interested yet! How do I cool it off with the 25yr old without hurting her? Shes in love with me and wants me forever but I really wanna wake up next to her friend! HELP! Reply to this Question
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reader, Jammy2006 +, writes (11 March 2006):
Jammy2006 is verified as being by the original poster of the question Update on situation....Told the 25yr old girl that I dont have those special feelings for her, just like the readers recommended. It broke her heart but then I hear rumours she has another boyfriend anyway! I dont believe this but still have doubts! Anyway her friend and I are getting to know each other but we only have 2 weeks before I leave for Australia until christmas! Its not fair but if things keep going as well as they are I will come back to Singapore and take the new girl with me to wherever I go. Thanks again J
A
female
reader, smeedle  +, writes (10 March 2006):
 There is no nice and gentle way to break up with this girl, you dont even fancy her so you need to make it clear to her that you just dont feel the same way as she does, tell her as soon as possible and be as gentle as you can but you have been misunderstood by this girl once so dont do it again, make the message as clear as possibel (no missunderstandings or false promises).
Give it a few weeks befor you ask new girl out and take it from there, good luck.
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female
reader, happytochat  +, writes (10 March 2006):
Hi there, well I know this feels like a awkward situation, because it is and you will probably think about it for ever, trying to find the 'right way' to break it to the 25yr old gently and to not 'hurt her feelings'. Ive had this problem alot and I think many of us have . Someone likes you but you dont have the feelings back and want to let them down gently, but there doesnt seem to be a way to let them down without hurting them at all. ANd i think you need to realise that, she will be sad probably and perhaps quite hurt, and thats just how it is unfortunatly. But by you telling her as soon as possible you are helping her to give her move time to move on and not waste time lieking someone who doesnt return the feelings. Its the best thing for her, to tell her as soon as possible. How do you tell her? well just say in your kindest words, something like 'i think your a great friend, i enjoy hanging out with you, but i dont have those speical feelings for you, as in more then friends. I really want to keep you as a friend, but nothing more. I hope that is ok with you. '...something like that. of course only add the wanting to stay friends part if u want to!!! thats honestly hte best thing u can do hey. maybe even point out some of her great qualities to boost her self esteem.
good luck! and remember, dont feel guilty for telling her how u feel.
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