A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:me n this girl just went on a date sorta thin to da movies and we held hands n stuff durin it but like thru the whle movie she was textin other guys coz and fliritng and i told i dont like it wen u flirt wiv other dudes and she said she wasentr flirting even thou she said this guy was the cutest and stuff. i askd her why like do i stand between her n all those other guys she texts n she has said that she likes me alot. but i sorta hinted at a kiss and like she rejectd me n wen i askd her what she say if i askd her out she was like a realli dunno n told me not to ask her yet...im kinda confused coz she sees me like everyweeknd sumtimes and she tells me she likes n opens up soemtimes but she still flirting(textin) all these other dudes??? what do i do coz i have treid telling her i dont like...me dad recons i shuld text chiks wen round her n wen she finds out i shuld tell her thats how i feel wen u text guys ect
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female
reader, Emilysanswers  +, writes (1 February 2009):
It really sounds to me like this girl only wants to be friends. She is enjoying having someone to hang out with and hold hands with, but she also likes flirting with other guys too so doesn't want to be tied down.
She is using you for the attention you give her and the good feelings that it gives her.
I don't want to sound mean to her as we girls have ALL done it to some poor guy. We just don't realise what we are doing at the time.
You've asked her to be with you and she said no, she just wants to be casual at the moment. If you are getting hurt by her texting other guys then you have to be strong and say that you can't be with her in the way she wants. You want her as a girlfriend and if you can't have that then you have to back off and try and get over her.
Good Luck!! xx
A
male
reader, Griffo +, writes (1 February 2009):
 I wouldn't completly blow her off just keep hangin with her, she could just be shy or something just try to enjoy her company.
Some girls like it to happen with no words or formality. They simply like it to grow within you. so you just being there with her says all the words without saying them. If you leave her it says you didn't want her.
Just keep being her mate you never know you might like it and she will tell all the girls about you and before you know it they will all be chasing you and want to hang out with you.
Cheers.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 February 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionyeah i hjave told her i like her more than a friend and stuff and she still tells me she likes me heaps to but i dunno ay im gonna jus see how it goes next week otherwise i prbly jus blow it wiv her n yer
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A
male
reader, Griffo +, writes (1 February 2009):
Firstly, a good hint is never tell a girl what to do especially if it has somthing to do with other guys, she will thing your too controlling. Major turn off!!!
I'd just keep hangin with her she's spending time with you because she is more comfortable around you. Though she may only be seeing you as a friend, that's not a bad thing, it's actually quite good because your going to be the one that she talks to about her feelings and stuff which also means at your age she's likley going to be one of those girls that will always be in your life.
If you really like her just tell her and tell her you want to be with her... More than friends! See what she says then. If there's no positive response for you then just remain her friend.
Somtimes being a girls friend/mate is far better then being with them. You know stuff like Forrest Gump or Benjamin Button sort of stuff.
I wish you the best, let us know how you go.
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