A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I've been seeing this girl for about a month so not long. It has been going great. We've seen a lot of each other and when we've not been together we've communicated by text or phone call pretty regularly. It's been nice cos she's been very keen to communicate and see me, as have I.Over the past week though, this has changed. We've not seen each other at all but I can understand that we've both been busy and haven't had a mutually convenient time to meet up. But also it seems the communication has started to slip. I will send her a text in the evening and she'll reply saying she's at home cooking or whatever and then after I reply again, I don't here from her again that day... But I can see that's she's on twitter favoriting stuff, et cetera all evening until the early hours. And yet she doesn't want to talk to me.Is it wrong of me to get annoyed that's she's not replying to me and yet she's doing stuff on social media? Is it wrong that I feel hurt? I can't talk to her about it cos it's still early days and I don't want to seem desperate but it does annoy me!
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (15 December 2014):
 I agree with Aunty BimBim.
texting is no way to have a conversation or a relationship.
It's a pretty hectic time of the year. She may just need/want more down time than you do.
In addition she does not have to devote every waking minute to attending to you. Some people prefer self-reliant partners.
As long as you are asking her out and she's accepting regularly, then it sounds like it's going well for early on.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 December 2014): No, she pretty much has placed you in the friend-zone. Her lack of contact with you is more or less letting you know she's not seriously considering spending much more of her time with you. Perhaps she had nothing better to do, and her social calendar was empty for a few weeks so she filled it with you. She may have decided she has a better prospect in mind. While placing you on the back-burner. If she's ignoring you, none of her reasons really matter anymore.
She doesn't sound like the kind of person you really want to waste anymore of your time or money on. She could have paid you the courtesy of letting you know she's no longer interested. Instead, she's giving you the cold-shoulder.
Just because someone enjoys dating you a few times doesn't commit them to you. Some people are very rude about how the disconnect with someone they've been dating. Some just abruptly cut you off without an explanation. You don't need one, this should be a red-flag. She's cold and rude.
If you know she's on other media and not responding to you, the mature thing to do is write her off and move on.
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (13 December 2014):
 What are you wanting her to say? It seems you text her, she says she is cooking dinner or whatever, you respond to that, and then she is supposed to ................ what and for how long?
Communicating by text can quickly become tedious, especially if you have just got home after a day of work or study and are looking forward to dinner and then just relaxing. If it has been a normal sort of day there is not going to be a lot of news to exchange, and trying to maintain a conversation when you dont have anything to say can be a real pain.
Rather than try and maintain a decent conversation by text try picking up the phone and, keeping in mind she has been busy and is possibly tired, just touch base, tell her you have missed her and are looking forward to the time when you can meet up in person again.
And finally, what this girl decides to do with her spare time is her business .......... if she is home doing her own thing, whether that is liking stuff on twitter or whatever, that is her right to spend her time as she wishes, and for you to be getting annoyed would be a turn off for many people.
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