A
male
age
36-40,
*eartbroken_m
writes:I have this problem with an ex-girlfriend of mine. We were dating for six months and I fell deeply in love with her. Then one day in May 2006 she just decided to break up with me because I was "chocking" her (not giving her time with her friends, not stopping kissing her, etc.). I remained in love with her and begged her every day for the rest of the school year to come back to me, but she didn't. School ended and I remained heart-broken, swearing to myself to never again accept her in my life. She tried to contact me several times during the summer, but I refused to see her (+ she was on vacation). The night she came home (begining of August) we had a looong conversation in MSN, and she wanted me to at least respect her, but I refused. Then she called me at 3 a.m. the same night and confessed that she still loved me, so I cracked and we got together again. After all that time I still loved her madly and was optimistic that it was going to be different this time. But it wasn't. She still did the same stuff as before: ignoring me, not being there for me, being annoyed of my attention to her. I kept my mouth shut because I was in love and I didn't want to lose her again, but she did it again. She left me in the begining of december, even more heartbroken than before. I don't know how I recovered, but after being heartbroken for a second time, my brain was telling me to totally forget her, and my heart was telling me to love her. Do you know what it means for someone to break your heart TWICE, and for you to love him with all the little pieces left? That was me. After a week of depression I called her up and told her I still loved her. She told me to go f*** myself. From that moment on (Dec. 15)I decided that I was going to hate her. We go to the same school and I see her every day, but I try to ignore her. She hooked up with other guys in front of me so that she could annoy me, and she did. Right now she does everything a wh*re does just to annoy me, and it's really driving me mad. Also, I made the mistake of calling her names and all that, so I think she hates me now. Unfortunately, I still love her and I am very confused at the moment. I don't want her in my life ever again, and, yet, I can't live without her. We don't speak to each other and I don't know what to do. I want to get back with her because I love her and I truly believe that she is the love of my life.Please, I need advice on what to do in this situation! I am desperate!Thank you for your time!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, heartbroken_m +, writes (26 January 2007):
heartbroken_m is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thanks for all the replies, they helped a lot! SweetSixteen, I am currently 18, and my girl is 16! We started dating when I was 17!
A
female
reader, SweetSixteen  +, writes (23 January 2007):
 i don't mean to cause offense by my answer but i am only 16 so i know what you and this girl are going through. you're using the word love too lightly. okay so you went out with her for 6 months but how old are you 14/15 at that age the word love to you means something that isn't in the dictionary. even at the age of 16 i admitt that as a younger person i thought i was in love but no one of that age is mature enough to know what the word means.
so you really liked her, but you wouldn't of wanted to spend the rest of your life with this person so you can't be heartbroken. have you thought that maybe she's over you and maybe she thinks that you're mature enough to be over her so she can get with other people and you won't be over dramatic about it. if she gives you that much credit to think that you're mature prove her right and get over her, move on with the rest of your life, if you do that maybe one day when your older you'll find out the true meaning of the word love.
Remember love comes with maturity.
Hope i helped SweetSixteen!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 January 2007): Move on..it over, done, finished, dear. When a woman does what you say she did (ignoring you, not being there for you, being annoyed of your attention to her)..what were her actions telling you? She had the opportunity to rectify that a second time and showed no improvement. If your ex-gf had really cared for you more, she' would've given her time and love to you freely. That was a huge, red blinking, red flag right there that she's was not as devoted to you the same way you were to her. She talked her way back into your heart once, you got hurt again and now you want to go back for more? Leave this girl alone and do the heartbreaking working of healing and recovering from her. Because if you ever did get her back, you'd tolerate her bad behaviors over and over again, destroying your self-esteem even more. It's time to take care of yourself. I dunno..I feel it's much healthier to be strong and heal, than to keep committing yourself to endless heartbreak . And I agree with Max...no more contact! Stick to your guns, leave her alone and get your self-respect back.
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A
female
reader, Ordinarygal +, writes (21 January 2007):
 Move on. She has made it clear to you. You deserve so much better......make a clean break x
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A
male
reader, maxsteel86 +, writes (21 January 2007):
 "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me"
Dude where's your self respect??? She's made it clear its over with you! You'll never move on if you're stuck on her. Stay away from her and stop contacting her. You seem to have a good head, listen to it! This is probably not the answer you wanted to hear but really, its definitely over
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A
female
reader, cd206 +, writes (21 January 2007):
 The thing is, it's not for you to be annoyed anymore if she's your ex. I appreciate she's treated you badly but however you feel about her post break up she's a free agent now and can do whatever she wants.
CD
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