A
male
age
,
anonymous
writes:I am a 48 year old who is very interested in a 35 year old female. I have been divorced for 9 yrs and have been looking for a long time for a woman with just her qualities. I am very picky. I have asked her out and we went out twice. She now claims I am too old for her and wants to be friends, yet she says that she can't find a decent guy whose ready to commit to a relationship. She still goes out with the wrong types and admits it openly. We are both professionals, I am a VP with a large bank and she is a commercial real estate broker. I believe I could fall in love with this woman if given the chance.What should I do? Move on, or continue to try and move our relationship from friends to something more meaningful. I must admit it is very difficult to see her with another guy and I have told so.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, pollyanna  +, writes (9 April 2007):
 I think she's nuts, personally... you sound like a really good catch! Go for someone who will understand that! Good luck!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 April 2007): I would remain friends with her for a while longer and give it time---maybe her feelings for you will change----if not you have lost nothing--just guard your heart so you dont get hurt.....
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A
male
reader, DreamMaster  +, writes (9 April 2007):
 Hi,
Although it saddens me to say it – I think you should move on,
Sometimes it doesn’t matter how much you like another person – they have to like you just as much for a relationship to work,
You actually got to try it out with this girl – but it didn’t work. She obviously saw some incompatibilities - and is trying to be nice to you about rejection because you come across as a very sensitive guy,
The reality of the situation is that you are heading into your 50’s, and she probably feels like she is only out of her 20’s a few years ago,
At least she gave you a shot – but it just isn’t meant to be – if she really wanted you – then you would be in a relationship right now with her,
All that in mind – the best thing for you to do is find someone else. Staying friends is not going to work for you either if you can’t bear to see her with another guy. You are always going to have feelings for her that will not be reciprocated. Your jealousy of the other guy will send you towards other negative emotions. That will probably just leave you yearning for her for a longer period of time, but without any success on this evidence.
Just put her into your past and put your energy into finding someone who likes you just as much as you like them,
Oh and I am not saying drop your standards, but "picky"(?). Are you really one to be picky? You cant expect many fabulous women around at your age – they are probably happily married. Just make sure the things you are being picky about are actually important (i.e. whether they like you or not) – and not silly things (i.e. they arent quite as fit as someone in their mid 30's)...
Best of luck.
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