A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi!Thanks in advance for your time. Briefly, I was out Friday and met a nice waitress in a lounge restaurant. We clicked. Good conversation along with sexual tension. She kept telling me she'd come back to our table to chat and she did with one time forgetting to check on other customers. I offered her my number. She replied I'll give you mine. I took it and before I left I told her I'd contact her soon but wasn't specific when. She was enthusiastic in response. She reached for a hug I gave it to her. 3 days went by and I sent her a message saying thank you again for helping my friends and I have a nice evening. How was your weekend? I got no reply so I called her once today and got no answer and didn't leave a message. I'm not sure what to do from here to get us talking again. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (5 December 2019):
 What's wrong with being eager? You ASKED to exchange number and she gave you hers.
So waiting 3 days is a waste of time. I know someone use a "3 day day rule" but really, that is rarely a good idea if you are REALLY interested.
And giving you her OWN number CAN mean she is interested, it can also mean she didn't know what else to do, and not come across as rude.
You have called, you have texted and gotten no reply. That I would take as an "answer"... Unless SHE also wants to wait 3 days.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 December 2019): Thanks for all the answers. They are helpful. I offered my number away from my friends. They didnt hear our exchange. Why not take it then never call me if she wasnt interested? She did ask a lot of questions and shared some personal family details which is also part of why i think she was genuine.
I called her again and left a short cheerful message. If she doesnt reply i think ive got my answer.
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A
female
reader, EmmyApple +, writes (5 December 2019):
The “wait 3 days” thing is old-school. Nowadays, it’s better not to wait too long. Don’t text her 2 minutes after getting her number, that would be annoying and clingy. But later on that night, or the next day, would be good. Sounds like she either lost interest, OR she was never actually interest. Many women fake interest because they are trying to be nice. She probably felt a lot of pressure after you gave her your number and asked for hers. Put yourself in her shoes. What’s easier? Saying, “No thanks, in not interested in you like that” to your face which requires a lot of courage to do and can be very awkward, OR simply giving the number and then ignoring it? She did the second option because it’s easier. If you are really into this girl, leave her a SHORT, friendly voicemail. Text messages suck and actually hearing your voice is a lot nicer. If she doesn’t respond to that, let her go. Do not leave multiple messages or you are going to annoy her.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 December 2019): Thanks for your reply. That could be possible. I waited to contact so as not to seem too eager. The number today has been confirmed it belongs to her so she is interested.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (5 December 2019):
Hmm, why did you wait 3 days? I mean if you were really interested in her?
And secondly, if she doesn't respond to text and won't pick up your call, I'd say she was being really friendly at work but perhaps not super interested in anything more.
If I were you, I'd accept that SHE isn't as interested as you had hoped and thought and then MOVE on and stop contacting her.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 December 2019): You don't do anything. You take the hint. If she's interested she'll get back to you. If not, then no amount of badgering her is going to help.
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