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female
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anonymous
writes: Hi, I began a relationship with a woman two years ago. We share a home now and she has a six-year-old son whom she is home educating. I am supportive but am concerned about the effects on her and him regarding the intensity of their relationship and their obvious need for a break from each other.When we met, she indicated that he would begin at Steiner school at age seven, but has now changed her mind and wants to continue home education. This will change our plans significantly, as it we had planned to have a business together - and I wonder if this is now possible. We rarely have any time together because of her commitments, and her decision will also has financial implications for me. It seems there will be an assumption I will support her and it's not discussed. I am heartbroken at considering ending the relationship but wonder if I am prepared to continue on these terms. A clear perspective would be appreicated and I look forward to your answer. Thanks, Erin
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 January 2006): Dear Erin
I think you really need to sit down and have a long talk with her. Maybe having a long thourough discussion, you two can come up with a "plan of action." It sounds to me like you might be behaving a bit selfish, due to you wanting a business, and her having to help you with it. Her son is obviously important to her and wants what is best for him. You can't just expect her to drop everything, as there is a child involved. You knew this when you met her. I believe that if you sit down and talk to her about all of this and explain how you feel, you should be able to comprimise with each other about both of your commitments. I don't think it would be fair to throw the towel in on this one. If you really care for one another I'm certain you will both be able to come up with some kind of solution.
Good Luck!
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