A
male
age
41-50,
*orontoGuy
writes:Am I being "needy"?This is something my girlfriend has accused me of and frankly I feel offended. Im in a long distance relationship in which i only get to see her once a month and i have refrained from talking about serious issues since she made it clear she doesnt always like to talk about things. I am a very open, heart on my sleeve type person. She is not. I dont need constant reassurance but I feel like my once high priority status in her busy life has all but faded. She said she wants this relationship to continue but to "slow it down". Considering the infrequency of our visits, our complete absence of tokens of affection (I miss you, I love you, I cant wait to see you) lately I feel like I want more than she does. I realise that our current situation prohibits us from seeing each other a lot and thats fine. I asked her where i stand and told her what i expect from a serious relationship and she wants to continue. Her email and texting frequency have all but gone silent, and she makes herself busy with a thousand things leaving no time or energy for this relationship. Am I being needy to want to be a priority in my girlfriend's life? After 4 months and after all we've said about how much we care, how can I stand to move backwards? I have been very understanding, giving and compromising in terms of giving her a lot of time and space to go to grad school on weekends and maintain a social life. Being 300 miles away and seeing each other so little and not saying anything intimate or affectionate, I just cant understand how she looks down upon my open heart as "needy". I would expect that at this point she would want more than we currently have. Maybe its not the right time for her, or maybe she just doesnt love me they way she did a couple of months ago. I've agreed to take our time considering she still has another year of school, but I dont want to waste my time spinning my wheeles wondering if she really cares about me.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 March 2007): it sounds to me like shes trying to give u the cold shoulder hunni! sorry xxx
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