A
male
age
30-35,
* ball
writes:I have been with my girlfriend for 10 months and for the past month she has been hurt because she say's that i have been distancing myself from her. in the beginning of the relationship i was still in school with her so we hung out everyday. then in the summer she went on a vacation with me . we hung out almost everyday during the summer as well. then in the fall she started school but i didnt because i graduated so we weren't able to hang out as much as we used to. and she works 3 times a week so we really cut out time we spent together in half. and it started to seem like every little thing i did upset her and when there was a problem in our relationship i was the only one who wanted to fix the problem so i started to do what i thought she was doing which was stop caring. but that decision just led to more problems and eventually i started to distance myself and by distancing myself i mean we only talked didnt talk on the phone as much anymore and we only hung out on the weekends. and because of my choice to push myself away i stopped feeling how i did in the beginning but i know for a fact that i still love her. and the effects that my distance have on her makes her upset everyday everyone tells me that she is always upset when they see her in school. and it also caused her mom not to like me any more. i mean trust me i have tried to talk to her about everything but it always goes back to how it is now. on saturday she just up and broke up with me so i took her out to lunch to talk about it we came to the conclusion that she would give me more space but the space is the problem already so it was a stupid conclusion so i dont know if we should take a break or even break up period i am so lost at this point i dont know what to do but i want to make the decision that just makes her happy again but it seems like the only one that will do that is to spend more time with her which i cant force myself to do so i am lost at this point i just need some advice on what i can do...
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reader, anonymous, writes (9 February 2010): well i know exactly how she feels! because this jerk that ive been seeing for 15 months now never makes any time for me,he puts everthing and everyone before me! and i hate him for it, its got to the point now where i never want to see him again. but you don't sound as bad at least you seem like you actually want to see her and try your best which is more than can be said for my guy. you just need to take time out of other things any free time that you have spend it with her. girls hate to feel unnappreciated! make the effort, and she'll be one happy lady. don't let her end up in my shoes and end up hating you for hurting her. you'll loose her. and it will be one heck of a job getting her back. think about whats more important to you seeing her or the other things? get your priorities in order! explain to her that you do genuinely get very busy but you will spend the free time you have with her. and if thats not very much time then theres always cell phones! and text messaging just make sure she knows you care and you two will be fine. xx
A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 February 2010): What i would do is sit down and talk to her tell her how you feel about her.And arrange somthing that helps you to be able to see each other more it might save your relationship.
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