A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I have been with my guy for 5 years! I have a high sex drive and he knew this when we first started dating. This was one of the reasons we kept seeing each other as he thought he'd died and gone to heaven...sex on tap! But as the years have gone on he's slowly going off it...he wants to cuddle! Pardon? Not what i signed up for! Now I know most people slowly stop having as much sex later on in an relationship but I cant handle it! I know he still wants me and finds me attractive and at first i thought maybe he was cheating on me but he doesnt have the time. He's stuck on an oil rig 28 days a month. anyway....I've told him I need him to try and 'put out' more. Nothing has changed....I am seriously thinking of going elsewhere...just for the sex..nothing else. Now the last thing i want to do is hurt my fella but what can i do to either calm myself down or get him going again?
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 August 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionbelieve me...as soon as he walks in I have him at the door....but then thats it...he's tired!! I understand that as he's been working hard..so you' think the next day he'd be up for it but no....I always go down on him ~(my fav) and once i've got him off he wants to cuddle!!
I use toys for 28 days of the month but its not the same thing!! I need the man!!!
Is this an unhealthy addiction to sex??!!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 July 2010): seriously, most guys sex drive calms down when they've been in a relationship for a while, if you love this guy then don't cheat on him, because the truth has a way of always coming to the surface.
i simply suggest that you do what most women do and use toys to make up for the rest. cheating is never the answer. it may possibly be something on his mind that he's worried about so he really just needs to feel your close to him.
if you love him you wont cheat.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (31 July 2010): if you want to just get laid, you have any man ready to do that. till you are young and till you do not ask any thing in return.
But my advice will be to you that never even cheat any one in the back. first you need to tell him and help him move on to his life and then you do what ever you want to.
If you cheat some one trust, you will never be able to see your self with pride and respect and that will be worst fall of your life. you can never face the world with same respect, and dignity and confidence, once your conscience start questioning you itself.
So i strictly advice against any kind of adventurism with your self and your conscience.
Believe me that if sex is the reason, 90 % women will loose their partners. Because usually the problem is just opposite.
I feel the issue that you mentioned is normal and all the relationship matures, most will take same route as you mentioned. Choice is yours..
You can think and do what ever you want in this world, but your deeds and results of those deeds will be with you and only you need to face them and i can tell you that result of sins is not as good as you think it will be.
choice of actions is always yours in this world. Most likely you are on the way to loose every thing that you have now.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (31 July 2010):
You need to talk to him again, this time making it clear that it is a deal breaker. PLEASE DO NOT CHEAT. You cheapen yourself, ruin the point of a relationship and it will seriously damage your reputation. No one likes a cheat, and few people bother with cheats again. So get that cheating idea out of your head, because it won't work. Instead, tell your boyfriend it's deal breaker and that if it doesn't change, you'll leave. And mean it.
Don't cheat. You'll hurt him, hurt yourself and look shabby in front of everyone who knows you.
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A
male
reader, bartmaverick +, writes (31 July 2010):
 Hey, cuddles are good - don't knock them!
but they need to be backed up by more intimate, shared activities. Do you try to initiate thing: stroking him, going down, etc?
Sex isn't like over-eating; you can't make yourself sick from too much.
I would have thought that after 28 days, returning to you he would have had you just behind the front door!
Bart.
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