A
female
age
30-35,
*afne
writes:Should he move? relationship HELP!!!?me n my bf have been dating over a year. he lives in Sacramento I live in Lake Elsinore around 400 miles away. we love eachother very much, and we see eachother as much as possible. He wants to move down here? and I'm afraid!!! of things being different with us. I mean he's 19 I'm 18 I feel like we are too young. he doesn't have to pay rent at the moment but I think things will pile up his car payment, phone, credit card, school and if he moves rent. he will be living here fresh no house no job. So my question is to you who have been in this situation, if u ever have no matter what age, how did u do it.? move in with them? how do I convince him to wait a year? HELP ME PLEASE :(So I have a boyfriend... Punjabi and Mexican??and he is punjabi (from india) and i am mexican(from Mexico lol) we have been dating over a year now and hes amazing!! Sweetest man i have ever met and i dont plan on losing him? i am worried because i am afraid that his parents (dad) will not like me i met his sisters and they are both really sweet I also met his mother but I was not formally introduced as his gf just a friend. The problem is his parents are really old school and i want to know what the parents would think of their son dating a mexican girl? Possibly marring? or how is he suppose to introduce me to them? and how do the old school Punjabi parents want their sons to marry?(arranged marriage?) He is the youngest and only son! He has met my parents and they love him especially because my parents do not care who i am with as long as i am happy! I'm not trying to change him in any way I respect his traditions just as he respects mine and I would love to learn about Sikhism and their language! sorry if this question doesn't make sense im trying to make it easy but there's no easy way to ask this!! please be nice (: and i would LOVE any answers i get3Who was wrong? Me or him?So me an my boy friend were "making love", and he was about to bust but I got off and I said I was tired. He made a remark and said "then what's the point of a girlfriend, if a guy has to do "it" by himself". For some reason that remark got to me in a bad way and I turned away from him and that's how the night ended. now I want to know if he is at fault for making that comment or am I for taking the wrong way?[Mod note: combined 3 questions from same user into one complete question.] Reply to this Question
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female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (17 February 2011):
 So, he is a Sikh ? Uhm. Normally, Sikhs only marry within their community and their marriages are arranged by their families. Even nowadays . That's because the interest and cohesion of the expanded family is thought much more important than any individual notion of romantic love. ( Did you see " Monsoon Wedding " ? ) I can't say your bf won't be the exception who'll rebel against tradition- but you'd better find out what his family thinks about that, and how relevant is for your bf his parents' opinion, before making any long term plan for you two.
As for him joining you right now, yes, it sounds a bit impulsive if he has not secured himself a job in your area , and does not even know if he has chances to get one. Maybe could he take some days off work and come and visit you ,to assess what are his perspectives in your local job market ? Or at least he could use one more year to save some money , which would allow him more time and serenity for his job search. But, do you want him there, regardless of money problem s ?... It sounds you are not totally cool with the idea...
As for his unfortunate comment, yes it was not the most delicate and appropriate thing to say, then again... he's only 19 and that's the typical reaction of a sexually frustrated teenager... you too, though, what a bad timing,uh ? All in all, I think you could forgive each other and try to have better communication in future..
A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 February 2011): Punjabi are good fun loving people and are also very hard working, they woould want their some to become a profissional, like Doctor engneer of MBA and do well in life. I am sure that his parents are doing well in life.
Well they would like to marry him to their type as that is the mine set, they would accept you if you are a profissional and need to be some one in life.
Punjabi's are very keen that education is most important and some one who has not gone to collage is not the type for them..
Hope it helps...
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 February 2011): Punjabi are good fun loving people and are also very hard working, they woould want their some to become a profissional, like Doctor engneer of MBA and do well in life. I am sure that his parents are doing well in life.
Well they would like to marry him to their type as that is the mine set, they would accept you if you are a profissional and need to be some one in life.
Punjabi's are very keen that education is most important and some one who has not gone to collage is not the type for them..
Hope it helps...
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