A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:Which of you out there feel the same as me. In an ideal world which would make me so happy it would be like this:Women would be celebrated for who they are in equal measure, whether it be because they were clever, great Mums, leaders, sportswomen, politicians, just pure brave, beautiful, sexy etc. However, the things they fought to achieve were seen as more important than what they were born with.Men would be grateful and happy to have exclusive sex with their own partner who loves them.Men saw all women as equal and would be as likely to support their own daughter in a career in prostitution as use one themselves.Porn occupied its rightful place in our world; small.Young girls didn’t feel pressured to look like porn stars to be considered sexy (ie fake tan, breast implants, straightened hair, nail extensions, no body hair at all)Paying for sex would not be normalised (and women would not be being brainwashed into accepting that sexual betrayal was a man’s right and something they have to put up with). Lapdancing clubs were seen as crude and uncool or at the very least licensed as being what they are: sexual encounter establishments.Women were not seen as mostly sex objects across all media in saturationWomen would not choose to be involved in the sex industry as it is now and betray our sex whilst lining their own pockets.Personally, I would feel as though a huge weight was lifted from my shoulders for all women and my daughters. Mainly because I believe that the over-sexualisation of women is costing us being taken seriously in all other walks of life. It is not a luxury for the boys, it is a con, directly at our expense in every way including careers, general sense of self-worth and ability to form, develop and keep meaningful and lasting relationships.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 June 2008):
Tellulah, if this isn't power, then what would be?
I agree that females still suffer from certain inequalities these days, but further change needs to come from within.
And the plight of male children and teens is just awful. It's truly amazing that the culture still thinks it's harder to grow up female than male. Almost every viable piece of raw research on modern kids shows otherwise, and by a big margin. Educational, social, emotional, etc.
A
female
reader, TELLULAH +, writes (13 June 2008):
 Mmm!! Really anon. You would think so wouldnt you.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 June 2008): Women are the majority in the voting and in the general population. They're doing most of the teaching to kids in schools. They're 2/3rds of the new college graduates these days. They're actually spending 2/3rds of all the money according to the advertising industry. And they're living longer in the end.
If the female gender really wants something changed, they have plenty of power to change it themselves.
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A
female
reader, TELLULAH +, writes (12 June 2008):
I kind of agree with you guys, but you must admit things have got a little out of hand. You dont have to look at porn, but its not as well hidden as it used to be. I have nothing against prostitution and those in the sex industry. If thats how they wish to earn there money then its up to them. I would rather earn my money working in a normal job (maybe I am the fool) but I dont think so.
I know you get a lot more lying on your back, if its your choice.
Also nobody mentioned that some of these girls are forced into working that way, by men. When do you hear of a woman that has become a pimp, and forced girls into taking drugs. Its probably as rare as rocking horse pooh!
I think this lady was mearly trying to point out that she thinks old fashioned values have seem to have dissapeared. Salad babarian, I think you are totally right when you say that a girl that lies about being raped should go to prison. She could have ruined the Guy's life, so of course she should be punished.
But the fact that you mentioned about sexual predetor's and pedophile's puzzled me. How often do you hear of a woman doing these vile acts?, it's very rare I can assure you. Most sexual predetors and Pedophiles are men, and that my friend is a fact.
I dont want to sound like a feminist, because a lot of what they want I dont agree with. I like it when my partner opens the door for me, I love it that he is stronger and looks after me. I do lots for him as well, so I think that we are almost equal.
I am ashamed to say that I have answered many questions on this site, telling girls that are obviously upset, they should not worry about there partners watching porn. I now am asking myself has it all gone to far? Are we all un-shockable.
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A
male
reader, Jamer70 +, writes (11 June 2008):
 i completly agree with lazy guy
You talk about woman being sought as objects but all i hear i how Hot Brad Pitt is and Look at the Footballers six pact etc
Do i care about the sexualisation of my gender! No not at all, why you ask? i dont carry others problems on my shoulder, i dont need them.
In addition you talk about other woman doing this and that. Instead of blaming them for what you think you cant do, instead look at why you havent done it. Dont expect every hooker to stop and become and media exec just because you may find it hard. I could go on and on about being black and how i look to others but i make my problems my own and dont put them on any one else.
I dont mean to be rude on anything but owning your own issues is half the problem, raise your daughter this way a healthy women who doesnt care what the media says and nothing will affect you at all
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 June 2008): I feel the same except that my ideal world would have the addition of:
Men wouldn't be seen as Neanderthals. They would be seen as intelligent and emotional individuals.
A man's worth would no longer be measured by the number of women he had sex with but by how he treats himself and others.
A man would be able to walk by a playground full of kids with out any of the mothers staring at him like he was a pedophile.
Women who had sex with children would be treated as sexual predators not victims. They would spend just as much time in prison as any man who raped a girl.
Fathers would be treated with the same respect given mothers and no longer as "Mr. Mom". If a couple divorced (which would be very rare) the father would be just as likely to get custody as the mother.
Young boys wouldn't be pressured to bury their emotions. Crying would no longer be a sign of weakness or evidence that you were mentally unstable.
No one would wear or even produce a shirt that said "Boys are stupid. Throw rocks at them."
Men would not be seen as sex maniacs in all media outlets.
Women who lie about rape would be put in prison for the same amount of time the person she accused would have spent there.
Men would no longer take part in portraying themselves as bumbling fools or perverts the media.
Right now the message to men consists of "You must think about sex every 7 seconds." "You must not have emotions." "You could never be the intellectual equal of a woman." in my ideal world the messages would be "Sex is an expression of deep love." "Expressing your emotions is normal and healthy." "Men and women process information differently. Neither way is better than the other."
In my ideal world men and women treat themselves and each other with respect and dignity.
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A
male
reader, LazyGuy  +, writes (11 June 2008):
 Which of you out there feel the same as me.
In an ideal world which would make me so happy it would be like this:
Men would be celebrated for who they are in equal measure, whether it be because they were clever, great Dads, leaders, sportsmen, politicians, just pure brave, beautiful, sexy etc.
However, the things they fought to achieve were seen as more important than what they were born with.
Women would be grateful and happy to have exclusive sex with their own partner who loves them.
Women saw all men as equal and would be as likely to support their own son in a career of womanizing as fall for one themselves.
Porn occupied its rightful place in our world; small.
Young boys didn’t feel pressured to look like movie stars to be considered sexy (ie fake tan, muscle implants, straightened hair, muscle enhancers, no body hair at all)
Charging for sex would not be normalised (and men would not be being brainwashed into accepting that charging for sexual favors was a woman’s right and something they have to put up with).
Chipendale clubs were seen as crude and uncool or at the very least licensed as being what they are: sexual encounter establishments.
Men were not seen as mostly sex/pity objects across all media in saturation
Men would not choose to be involved in the sex industry as it is now and betray our sex whilst lining womens pockets.
Personally, I would feel as though a huge weight was lifted from my shoulders for all men and my sons. Mainly because I believe that the over-sexualisation of men is costing us being taken seriously in all other walks of life.
It is not a luxury for the girls, it is a con, directly at our expense in every way including careers, general sense of self-worth and ability to form, develop and keep meaningful and lasting relationships.
--- Be very very careful what you ask for when you want equal treatment. Because it does NOT mean what you think. If you want me to treat you the same as a man you better be prepared to be treated like a man.
Go ahead, persuade all the hookers and women who trade sex for favors they got to go work in a factory. Why is that the feminist always talk about the glass ceiling but never about the factory floor?
Be a feminist all you want but 99% of them are like the pacifist who hide behind their countries army, all talk, no action.
In your entire point there is not a single point where you say WOMEN should do X to make the world a better place. Who do you think makes those women mags pushing fashion on women? Hint: It ain't men.
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A
female
reader, TELLULAH +, writes (11 June 2008):
Hi,
In an ideal world, maybe you have a point, although there many women out there that are just as addicted to porn as men. Its a shame that things have gone the way that they have, but its the same with violence. I remember being one of the only mums at my sons school, that didnt buy him guns and other types of toys like that. My friends thought I over reacted and that they were just toys. But look at the world today, 18 years later and you have children stabbing each other in the street.
I am not against the sex industry, most of the time I dont come accross it. But I do understand how you feel.
Unfortunatly Honey! Its a mans world and it always will be, no matter how hard we try to convince men we are equal. Some will just never get it!
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