A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I am 19 year old who was taken away as a toddler when I was 3 years old from my biological family (11 children total). The state of Louisiana put me into foster care and I eventually was adopted out. My foster family was slightly dysfunctional at first. I knew they loved me. However, once I turned 18 I decided to celebrate with a few friends because I just graduated. My foster dad was threatning me that if I didn't come home AT THAT INSTANT that he would kick me out. I ignored his phone call. I never returned home because he wouldn't allow me. Here are just a few things you should know: My foster dad is a gay cotrol freak who loved me a long time ago.My foster mom and dad now are having sex with other men. My mom was never like that before. I think she lives in denial. It has been over a year now and they threw out all my personal belongings out on the steet. I have a twin brother who might have been raped as a toddler by my foster dad. He has serious anger issues. He is bipolar. My foster dad will talk to my brother but not me.What should I do? Try to work it out with my foster family. I know deep down that my foster mom loves me. I am scared to return because they might call the polie on me. I am not sure to let this past life die out or not. I really lov my mom and kinda my dad. But they don't want me over. I am confused. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 September 2010): what if it were ur real family?
ask urself and decide!
wud u not like ur family be alrit?
u surely would hav been wanting ur parents be functional again,wotever u hav to do for it- any sort of treatments care and love- rit?
for sure child abuses leads life threatenings!...stil think once more.if they were ur real parents wudnt u want them be normal?and make efforts via ur love care and of-coarse if needed,treatments too!
coming upto the point,if they dont call the cops- u simply visit home n ask them if u can be family again!
no offense would be meant then for sure! u not forcefully being a part of them, just going home and requesting! rit?
and as per legal terms ( tho not sure!!,make it clear first),if u r adopted, u r the duty of ur foster parents!
now coming to the point that has been in asnwer above, thinking about ur child is still very far away....who knows til tht time ur family be a perfect one?!?
atleast give it a chance!
simply listen to ur inner voice! wot ur heart and head says!
and if u take them as ur real parents.....surely one day,even they wil!.....because vibrations works....
A
male
reader, rcn +, writes (7 September 2010):
 I'd say to contact them through a letter or through your brother, and ask whichever one you feel you can talk to, to meet somewhere public to talk, such as over coffee or whatever.
Although you had this dysfunction, you are your own person. Don't allow their inaction to affect who you become. You are to important as an individual and as an adult, it'd time you decide who you are and who you will become. Whether or not they decide to be part of your life is up to them, but don't let this cause a detriment to your life and your being. Going through what you have has to have been difficult, but in ways must have added to your strength as well. You also need to decide, if you get married and have children, if their environment is one you want your child introduced to. It may be hard for you to protect them from it, or explain why their can't be a relationship there, when you choose to reestablish one. So there are other factors, short-term and long-term that you want to consider. If there is a possibility of your brother getting assaulted as a child, I wouldn't want my child knowing who these people are.
I hope this helps. Take care.
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