A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I've been about three years without a date, and every once in a while I think to myself "Man, I'd really like to spend more time with her." There are a few reasons I don't act on those feelings not the least of which is the fact that I sincerely don't feel like it would go anywhere, and that if it did I would fail to be the kind of man the kind of girl I'm looking for would be looking for. (I have no idea how to condense that concept down into a more understandable sentence :D)I don't have a job, I dropped out of high school and- though I'm smart and I love to learn, and have continued to- have no interest in college right now. In addition, I consider myself an extremely boring person, and barely ever go out of my way to do things with other people.What's the best way- if at all- to approach a potential date when you have all these thoughts in your head keeping you from bothering? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, YourCoach +, writes (9 May 2013):
Just chillax dude, be yourself and stop looking. You need to realize, life ain't a movie, so you definitely won't meet your princess just so out of the blue. Concentrate on other things and eventually someone will appear in your life.
And son, be more open towards new experiences. It will lead you to great things.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (4 May 2013): It's ok. Relax! I went a couple years without a date too and just broke the streak, so you definitely can get back in the game.
You can definitely act on your feelings if it's just asking a girl out. Obviously, if you don't feel it will go anywhere, then the person probably isn't right. But if you do feel an attraction, isn't it worth finding out? Until you've dated her you really don't know. Different women like all kinds of men so you are the right guy for some woman. Even if you don't go out as much as other people, there must be some things that interest you. Try to enjoy yourself and do what interests you and before you know it you will not be boring to the girl you like.
The best way to approach a potential date is to remember it's just a date. Maybe she'll say no. Maybe she won't want to move forward. But you won't know unless you take the first step.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 May 2013): Stop beating yourself up and take some proactive steps to change your situation. You must have some hobbies or outside interests. Develop them and rebuild your self-esteem. how do you expect a woman to like you if you don't like yourself. Join some volunteer groups in your community and get to meet the people in them. Your past doesn't have to equal the future. Good-luck.
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A
female
reader, queenadelaide  +, writes (3 May 2013):
Baby steps. Start doing the things you enjoy, whether it's reading or joining local clubs and societies. Engage in the things that interest you. They are what makes you interesting.
You can't interest another if you have no interests ;)
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