A
female
age
30-35,
*ElPFUl AsHlEy AsK mE QUESTi0NS
writes:I need help, my boyfriend and I have been dating for almost 1 month, but we have known each other much longer that. He is honestly one of the most romantic guys ever. We have talked about sex and planned things, but when it comes down to it, I'm scared.. I was raped more than 3 times by my uncle..and I'm scared that my boyfriend won like my body... or I might ( stink or might taste bad ) although I am a health-ish freak about my girl..so shes clean...but...I'm very self concious...but I have a nice body, he wants to eat me out..but idk..someone please help me out...btw.. hes 17 I'm about to be 15.. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, HElPFUl AsHlEy AsK mE QUESTi0NS +, writes (2 April 2008):
HElPFUl AsHlEy AsK mE QUESTi0NS is verified as being by the original poster of the question Just some more info...
I have had counseling, and i have known my boyfriend for almost 5 years... since i was in 5th grade..so its not like im trying to just "lose my virginity by choice" to " Some Guy"..and i do know the consequences of sex and the bennifits of sex...i am in high school..and i am taking classes about sex and stuff so im not a young person who dosnt know things about sex..
thought i should write this to help with the answers...
Thank you Guys!! =]
Ashley
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 April 2008): My first girlfriend told me just before we were going to have sex that her uncle did this to her. I was stunned and panicked so we didn't have sex. It freaked me out and I didn't want to have sex with her after she told me that only because I felt so bad she had this happened to her and I thought of myself then as just another guy abusing her even though we had perfectly innocent great relationship. She also had really bad image of her body even though she shouldn't had. Abuse can have deep scars related to body image and sex so be so careful. I liked her so we talked about it a lot and I talked to adults I trusted about it. We waited almost a year and when we did it it was really sweet. She was 18.
I'm sorry but 15 is too young especially after having gone through what you did. Knowing someone 1 month at your age to have sex even without incest issue is just not smart at all. Given what happened to you, you need to work on building healthy relationships and your own self esteem so that the idea of even having sex does not scare you. Don't just into bed. That is just my opinion.
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A
female
reader, birdynumnums  +, writes (1 April 2008):
 Oh Hunny,I'm sorry about your past experience of being sexually abused by a family member. I was wondering if you have discussed this with your parents and if you have been to any kind of counseling to deal with the fallout. Often, girls who have been abused become sexually active at a younger age. It isn't necessary to sleep with a person to get them to love you, just incase that was an issue here. That can be an issue for people coming from abusive backgrounds.Although I don't think that that is what YOU are doing here, and it DOES sound like your boyfriend is a sweetie and loves and respects you, I would urge you to consider slowing down a bit if. WHY? Just because you are writing in here, you are nervous, you're young, and you're a bit hesitant, which feels to me like you might not be ready yet. Just a thought, if you are writing in for people's opinions. Remember, Your Body - Your Rules. Don't let anyone else talk you into doing something that you aren't quite ready for yet, especially considering the background that you are recovering from. If you haven't had counseling, I think you might benefit from it, and it could help you feel more comfortable about your own body and sexuality after all you have been through. Take Care Hun.
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