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female
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anonymous
writes: Had a great date over a week ago with a guy met on net..he made all the right moves added me as a friend on FB etc (i wouldnt have so early on as it tells you so much about people and you can see what the other is doing all the time!). The date was great we were out all night till 2am from 7pm. He said all the right things, said wanted a girlfriend, made references to loads of things we would do and friends and family he wanted me to meet etc. We did a lot of kissing nothing else, i was going away for the week and when i was leaving he was like 'oh im so gutted your going away and i cant see you again this week', he arranged to see me again on saturday (yesterday), said he had friends bday thing friday. however friday came and it seemed he had dot the dates wrong and the party was saturday..which he text and said but didnt make clear that meant cancelling our date. I had to text him back to clarify he then apoplogised said sorry for letting me down, and said we would rearrange for next weekend but i didnt feel bowled over with his desperation to see me which didnt fit his earlier behaviour! We might be meeting fri eve but it is already shaky as he has a work thing on but said could get out of it early and meet me after. I know im being negative but im already waiting for him to let me down and make some blagging excuse about not getting out of work party.Am thinking he is just not that into me and dont want to cling to the hope that he might be (even though i was convinced he so was after the date) and we discussed that kind of messing eachother about thing on the date. I know am probably thinking too deeply about it as it is december and life is manic for all of us but would that justify the messing about!?
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female
reader, Lexie88  +, writes (14 December 2009):
 You don't know him at all and what else he has going on in his life...so analyzing things this early on won't help you, it will just confuse you more.
Don't get hung up on the fact that he said all the rights things, alluded to future plans and meeting his friends/family. The only thing you need to know is that words are very cheap...it's the actions that count.
You met him online...what are the chances he's had a few other dates after yours and he found someone he liked better and is now pursuing that but is also keeping you there just in case this other girl doesn't work out?
At this stage I don't think he's that hot for you...he would make more effort if he was really interested.
What you can do is not put so much into this so early on. When you've been out with someone once don't take their words as the whole truth...look at their actions. Only start to trust the words once the actions prove that the guy is genuine.
So for now, let it go. If he doesn't make the effort to see you again, move on. Plenty of men where he came from.
A
female
reader, pinktopaz  +, writes (13 December 2009):
I think for right now that you are looking too deeply into this. He cancelled one date due to confusion on his part and he let you know. If he stood you up, then yeah I could see that as things aren't going to take off whatsoever. Just relax, he made arrangements for another time, it wasn't an "I'm sorry I got dates mixed up, maybe another time," and he EVEN said he can try to get out of it early. Just chill out a bit and see what happens; things happen in life and he can't have it revolve around you just to show how "into" you he is.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 December 2009): He probably isn't into you. Just move on. If he's into you, he won't act like this. It happens to all of us.
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