A
female
age
30-35,
*imblebee90
writes:Rite guys.. I've been with my boyfriend for 18 months now. But I've met some new friends when I went to college and didn't really have any this good at school. I am really ejoying goin out more and am wondering whether I would enjoy being single again. I'v tried talkin 2 him about it but all he does is get REALLY upset and jealous and then I feel sorry for him.. I know I should just get a backbone and tell him out straight, but I don't want to break his heart. I am just torn. I love him, I just don't know if I am IN LOVE with him anymore. But I am scared of making a mistake if i am not sure what i want... Any help is greatly appreciated!!!!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, askJAY  +, writes (17 December 2008):
 WOW!
Been there. Now there again!
Remember the film called "why did i get married?"? Someone said something there that made a lot of sense. I just wish i could remember the actual phrase, but it was somewhere along the lines of never leave the one you love for the one you like.
think about it. give yourself time before you approach the topic "maturely" with your bf. you guys do need to talk properly about it without him getting upset, but that's why i say think first. you don't want to regret what you say.
i agree with anonymous above me, that if what you are looking for is promiscuous excitement, then gosh-dammit, THINK AGAIN. you will be left feeling empty and longing for the bond of a committed relationship.
anyway, i know i haven't been of any help, but there are two important sides to this...1, you don't want to hurt him and then regret doing so if you realize you were wrong, but 2, you don't want to make yourself unhappy because you pity the guy!!!!!!!
my agony aunt advice would simply be to go and learn the hard way by breaking up with him and loosing him, then having empty fun :)
i am a gemini, so not a good person to help you make decisions haha
ciao
A
female
reader, kimblebee90 +, writes (30 April 2008):
kimblebee90 is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thanks for all the comments guysThey have helped me loadsI'll keep you posted on what I decide to do=]
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 April 2008): i'm actually in te same situation right now. ive been with my bf for a year and i love him i really do it's just that i don't feel i'm IN love with him anymore. im 21 so i also get to think how would my life be if i were single. i just don't want to make the wrong decision. i wish i could be more helpful, or helpful at all jaja but i can't. i believe it is a decision you have to take on your own. just don't rush it. take your time to think how much do you reallu love your bf and if being single is what you really want. sometimes it my sound awesome the idea of being single and having fun, but you can have fun with your bf also. try to think if it's possible for you to fall in love again with him, if you ever were,,, and if you WANT to. if the answer to any of that is no, i wouldn't take it any further. you are just going to end up hurting him and hurting yourself. right now the problem seems to be your friends and the fact taht you want to have fun. but if you don't love him and still do nothing, anything can turn into this problem.
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A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (30 April 2008):
 Life means taking chances, and taking responsibility for the chances we take.
It is very clear to me that you don't love your boyfriend anymore. Tell him the truth, so he can rebuild his life. And, if you make a mistake, well, accept it.
The alternative is NOT dating anyone else. It is very clear that is not what you want.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 April 2008): you should definatly go out there and enjoy your life as a single girl, it will be hard but all through your life there will be loads of guys like ur current boyfriend who wont want the relationship to end, but youll realise that this is just emotionall blackmail and youll end up resenting him if you stay with him, your probably comfortable with him but think of the freedom youll have once hes gone. if you were "in love" with him you wouldnt even contemplate ending it, seems like you love the guy and care deeply about how he feels but thats not enough chick, go out there and enjoy your new found freedom while you can
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