A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi,i really need some help here urgently.My younger brother who is 21 is overweight-he weighs just over 18 stone and is about 5ft 10.He is quite shy, never had a girlfriend and doesn’t have many friends he just watches TV and plays on his play station.He eats big portions and snack all the time. Me and mum have stopped buying junk food but he will just buy it himself when he goes to work (he is sat at an office all day and doesn’t burn calories). For his birthday last year I paid for him to have 3 months membership at the gym and him never went-despite me and my boyfriend offering to go with him. We have a treadmill and various exercise equipment at home which he won’t use.I even offered to get him a personal trainer to come to the house so he wouldn’t have to go to the gym as he is self conscious but he said no!My boyfriend who my brother gets on famously with offered to take him running 3 times a week and my brother seemed up for it and bought himself trainers, jogging bottoms etc and then kept putting it off saying it was to cold, or he didn’t feel well or he was to tired!All the family is worried about him and we fear he wont help himself until its to late and he's in hospital surrounded by tubes.HELP! We don’t know what else to do!! He is so lazy and forever coming up with excuses.Please, please I need some advice as im running out of ideas of what I can do to help him.Thanksx
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female
reader, TELLULAH +, writes (5 January 2009):
 Hi Babe,
Sounds like he might have other problems besides his weight. He sounds like he has very low self estem, and is comfort eating because of this. Try to put yourself in his shoes, its like going around in a circle. He doesnt want to be fat, but is to scared to do anything about it and gets depressed, so he then goes and eats again. Its such a shame, because the only person that can really help him is himself. He has to want to do it, because all the badgering in the world will not make him lose weight if he doesn't want to.
You and your family are doing all you can, you are supporting him, and you love him, so stick to your guns and dont give up. Hopefully he will see that you all care about his health and come round to letting you help more.
Just a thought! have you suggested weight watchers, because once he loses a few pounds he might feel a bit more energetic, and be willing to exercise. Also get him to see a doctor and make sure that there is no other reason for his weight gain.
Best of luck honey, he is a lucky boy to have such a great family. Tell him I said so.. XXXXXX
A
female
reader, redemption  +, writes (5 January 2009):
You've done all you can to help him, he needs to help himself. I'm not sure how much 18 stones is, but if he's morbidly obese maybe you could try getting him to see a doctor for a physical, to show him the damage he's doing.
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