A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:I have been in a nice relationship for eighteen months after coming out of a painful marrage. After two years being single and bad dates, I met this wonderful man through a business associate. The honeymoon stage seemed to have lasted through the whole first year. "I'm in love". My Partner started a small business related to some areas of my field of work to help me get back into full time work. We started slow, attended meetings together etc. I was so excitied I even turned down full time work to take a chance. We started to get calls and I started to set up meetings etc. My Partener seemed to become frustrated when my contacts were not working. He started to call others through my contacts to help, so I thought that was ok. Then he met this young woman who said she could help and he was very impressed with her. He asked me to meet her and she was experienced, but I thought the whole point of starting something was to help me, I guess I was wrong. She arranged meetings with her contacts and He attended but I was not included. Our dating continued and he says he is just trying to grow the business fast so that I can take over certain areas. This woman is single but their friendship seems to be just for business purposes. He still has my pictures and love notes around with in view nothing has moved. He says I am having a self esteem problem and that he loves me dearly. I admit it took me a long time to trust. I am wondering should I try to work it out or move on. Please Help
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reader, anonymous, writes (6 September 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the question This is for Followup Post: I would like to say thank you for the great advice. The advise has allowed me to think of this situation from a different prespective. I am working on communicating my feelings more open and to listen to my own intuition.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 September 2009): You have two problems here. First, you are worried that he may cheat on you or dump you for the other woman, so there is a trust issue. Secondly, you are totally committed in the sense that you are not only personally involved but also now business-wise you are partners too! That's a lot of faith to put in one person, especially after having a previous relationship that failed. You are going to have to decide whether or not to go forward with this partner, in both business and personal matters, and then stop second and third guessing your own decision. This partner may get fed up with all of the growing suspicion and it will make you look insecure and needy. Maybe you need to get out of the business aspect of this partnership if at all possible. Sounds like it may be too much. Good luck.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 September 2009): I don't understand the nature of your business so it is just about impossible for an outsider like myself to judge what is taking place, but I don't see any real sign that he is dumping you for her. If he keeps all your pics and notes in plain site, then she knows your his girl, etc.
Did you contribute financially to this business, or is it his? Really, the person you need to be having this conversation with is him. Figure out what exactly it is that you need from him in order to feel more secure and then ask him for those things and see what he has to say about it.
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