A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Thi is not a new thing. My husband has always had a long refractory period. The minimum is about 24h. We met in mid-20's and now are in our forties. We're both in good shape, eat well, exercise, still love each other and are very much attracted to each other. We discussed this on several ocassions and since it is not a condition we should be worried about, we simply considered it normal, like one urologist has suggested. So, why am I asking now?Because, due to stress (work, financial situation, overall crisis), we started having sex less and less, until we go on a holiday. Once away from the city and the office, we're back to a 4-5 times a week.I was wondering if any of you have a similar experience and is there something that can shorten that period? Since it's not his libido that is a problem, traditional solutions ("spicing up sex life") do not seem to work, although they somewhat help with the stress I mentioned.Thanx!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, celtic_tiger  +, writes (15 December 2015):
 I think you are looking at this problem all wrong.
YOUR problem is the lack of sex - really this is just a symptom of the REAL problem.
Stress.
This is the thing you need to address before anything else. His mind is preoccupied, and you need to fix the root cause of the problems.
As you have said, when you go on holiday everything is normal, so there is nothing "wrong" with him, apart from the stress issue.
Sex habits do change as you age, as a relationship develops - that is perfectly normal. What you did in your twenties is not always what you will do later in your relationship.
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