A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:Dear Cupid I have been seeing some one who I have been in love with for years but we had only just discovered each other again. He felt the same but we always managed to miss each other through life. It has been going on for 4 months but the pain of the deception to our partners was too great and we both decided to finish it. I just can't deal with the pain of parting at the moment and feel like I want to end my life, which I know is incredibly selfish as I have a daughter and husband. Is it best to cut all ties or stay in touch by email, which would be easiest and how can I deal with this pain indefinitely. Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (20 June 2008): I suggest that if both of you want to make a concerted effort to make your marriages work; NO CONTACT; not even by email: you will have to cut all ties;
otherwise you are going to prolong the agony and pain; you are not going to be yourself and being miserable around your spouses is not going to do your marriages any good.
Start putting in effort with your husband and child; start paying attention to them and start think of ways to make life with them more interesting and exciting;
You will have to train and controll your thoughts; yes, sure it will be difficult at first; but with time it gets easier; find other things to occupy your mind.
Be strong and good luck!
A
female
reader, Honeygirl  +, writes (20 June 2008):
 Honestly... as hard as its going to be you have to cut all ties with him and put your energy back into your marriage. A marriage cannot grow if one partner is constantly longing for someone else... Perhaps seek counselling to help you to cope.
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