A
male
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:Hello all, I've been with my girlfriend for around seven years. We are our firsts in pretty much everything. Love her to bits still. No fights, good sex life, nothing wrong really. However, something has occurred in our sex-life which I think might be problematic. Our sex life is fine except that lately, everytime I give her an orgasm, she starts to bleed. Not a little, but actually a lot. She will not bleed when turned on or during foreplay, just when she is orgasming. It looks almost as if she is menstruating (although she isn't) It is not as if I'm harming her as it has happened during oral or just fingering (without entering). During penetral intercourse it happened once, without the orgasm. I am not new to menstrual blood but the 'mess' and the smell of blood does make foreplay/sex a turnoff. She herself experiences pain during orgasms now, sometimes good, sometimes bad. So frankly I am now hesistant to make her orgasm, purely because she will bleed and the possible turn-offs and frustrations this might bring. She recognizes the problem, is getting frustrated and went to the doctor already. She can't even get herself off on her own or she will bleed. Doctor suggested a different kind of birth control...however...She has been on the same kind of anticonception (pills) for years and we also use condoms.. What could be happening? Std's? Cheating? Pregnancy? A female thing I just dont know anything about? Thanks for your advice.
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condom, fingering, foreplay, orgasm, sex life, std Reply to this Question
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (14 June 2017):
 Gynecologist, this is not normal and she needs to be seen SOON! Be there to support her not to judge her!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 June 2017): What kind of man are you that you jump to the conclusion that it could be cheating? Where is your compassion for your girlfriend? If you were bleeding from your penis during sex would you go to the Doctor, knowing you had a medical problem? Of course you would.
I suffered an erosion of my cervix and the first time I bled profusely during sex my my partner stopped the sex and gave me awesome support. He was concerned for my health. He knew it was a medical issue.
I have never cheated on him. But he would never have even considered cheating. His trust in me is always there and I have always been faithful to him.
My partner also drove me to the specialist and waited while I saw the specialist.
The problem was easily fixed. I was called back to have a procedure to fix the problem. The specialist called my partner in after the procedure and explained the problem and said ''no sex, no foreplay in that area'' until the area was fully healed. My partner respected that rule too, and waited until the follow up appointment when the specialist gave the all clear for things to get back to normal.
The problem reappeared 5 years later and was fixed again. Same process and same wait. My partner never grumbled about it. Instead he was helpful and insisted I put my feet up and rest when we arrived home from hospital the second time.
The cervical erosion caused no infertility, nor would it. Because it was an erosion of the cervix.
We went on to have two beautiful children with no problems.
You need to treat your girlfriend more respectfully.
Support her to get the urgent medical attention from a specialist gynecologist..
Learn too to have more trust in your long suffering girlfriend.
Your attitude does not suggest that you will be a loving kind and respectful partner if all you can think about is your own needs and if your first thought is that she may be cheating.
That kind of thinking is out of date and unacceptable in the 21st century.
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A
male
reader, N91  +, writes (4 June 2017):
 The fact that you haven't asked her to get this checked out already and that you're more worried that she's cheating on you is extremely alarming.
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A
male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (3 June 2017):
 A doctor is needed but I'll bet it's intense pressure breaking a blood vessel.
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A
male
reader, Billy Bathgate  +, writes (3 June 2017):
SHE NEEDS TO GO TO HER GYNECOLOGIST! If anyone says different ignore them and encourage her strongly to GO TO HER GYNECOLOGIST NOW!
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A
female
reader, Anonymous 123  +, writes (3 June 2017):
 My God your options are STDs and cheating? She needs to see a gynaecologist without any further delay because any bleeding which is abnormal is exactly that... It's not normal and it shouldn't happen. Common sense says that when her uterus spasms from an orgasm, she's dispelling that blood. The gynaecologist will be able to tell you where it's coming from. Also, pain during orgasms is not normal in any way. It could be PCOS or any other condition. Please get it checked and stop doubting her
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A
female
reader, Andie's Thoughts +, writes (3 June 2017):
 She needs to see a gynaecologist before it gets worse. It's highly unlikely it could be something to do with cheating; it's a health concern.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (2 June 2017):
 I agree with a visit to a Gynocologist. Cheating? No. It can be that she is starting to develop cysts in her uterus and sex makes her bleed. However, THAT is just a guess, she REALLY needs to a gyno.
Now it CAN be her birth control as well, but she won't know till she has had a thorough check up.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 June 2017): Perhaps she should see a gynecologist, rather than her regular general-practitioner. GP's don't specialize; they will often make referrals. A lot of bleeding other than during her menstrual period could be a sign of a cervical infection, chlamydia, vaginal-dryness, or an STD.
Don't jump to wild conclusions; but she should seek another medical-opinion. You may be creating a lot of friction and you just don't realize it. You admit you know nothing about female problems; and know just enough about their anatomy.
Go get checked for an STD, just in-case. Don't be quick to blame her; because you can also pass on infections orally. If you know you're not 100% faithful, or may have slipped once. Do yourself and your lady a favor.
I am a little skeptical that she has actually seen her doctor, or a specialist. She may have only seen a physician's assistant, and didn't go into enough detail. Maybe because it is somewhat graphic. Sometimes people are embarrassed about discussing intimate-details of their sex-lives; even with their doctors.
A consultation with an on-call physician may be the full extent of her healthcare coverage, or a call was all she did. If you're Muslim, or practice a fundamentalist religion; she may be hesitant to disclose that she is having premarital-sex.
Did she mention anything about tests or an examination of any sort? How did the doctor just come to the conclusion it might be her birth-control without ruling-out an infection?
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A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious +, writes (2 June 2017):
 Your girlfriend needs to go to the doctor's to get checked out to rule out anything serious. The sooner the better. As far as I am aware, nobody on here is a qualified doctor. Even if they were, they do not know your girlfriend's medical history.
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE get her to make an appointment as soon as possible.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 June 2017): It is best to see a gynecologist as soon as possible. It can be something simple such as an infection or something serious or it can be the effect of the prolonged use of the pill. Only a doctor can tell what it is but please don't ignore the symptoms and let her see a doctor ASAP.
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