A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:An acquaintance of mine introduced me to his little brother (who's 31; I'm 21) last month, and I've seen his brother around a couple of times since then and chatted to him. Long story short, I really fancy his brother - he's got an amazingly nice personality and respects women and is a total gentleman (I follow him on Twitter, as he told me to do so - he paints in his spare time and always Tweets his paintings - I'm into art too). He's really handsome too, and very tall. My acquaintance (whom I don't know very well, and doesn't know I like him) told me that he's a "nice guy" in conversation.However, I'm just not in the right place for a relationship at all. I have some major family problems to deal with, I only moved here last summer so I don't know many people in the area, and I have to focus on my career right now as I'm really busy at work right now. I shouldn't be dating till next year at the earliest. I'm physically attractive, but not emotionally ready for a boyfriend. Even if we did get together I'd constantly be feeling inferior.I need to stay focused, but thinking about the guy I like is a constant distraction. I'm also worried that another girl will "snap him up" if I don't make a move (he is very popular with women, though doesn't take advantage of it). I know I'm 21 and I'll meet other guys, but this one is so kind/nice I actually haven't met too many others like that.Help! How do I get over him? Should I just stay friends for now? Thanks
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 May 2015): why not ask him out?
A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (12 October 2014):
 When you are going to meet him again, first see if there's mutual liking. Then explain your situation and let him decide if a few months is too much to wait. Hopefully a guy in his 30's he's past the age to be impatient and just wanting to score. If the connection is real then the wait is worth it. You got to have the faith that people are willing to wait too. Whether he's too good for you, that's for him to judge. You are working hard for yourself and looking forward to live. So that's a good quality right there.
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