A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I’m probably overthinking this but it’s upset me and made me a little paranoid….The other weekend my husband and I went to London for his Birthday - we were going to have a nice dinner, watch a show and see some of the attractions. Whilst I was there my friend (who I’ve known for 14 years and was my maid of honor at my wedding and who I was bridesmaid at hers) was also in London with her husband - for their anniversary . Neither of us knew the other would be in London.She tagged herself in on Facebook with lots of photos, of them having lunch, cocktails and sightseeing. I texted her to tell her that my husband and I were also in London to have dinner and watch a show and that I hope she had a nice time and wished her a happy anniversary.I saw she read it (within 10 minutes of me sending it) but never replied.I then went back on Facebook and saw she had deleted her post about being in London. I then get a text from her late on Sunday (when I had gotten home) saying she had only just read my text (lie) and that she hoped we had a nice time. Funnily enough around the same time she put a post on Facebook with all their photos of London again. I’m assuming she delayed replying to me and removed her FB post as she assumed (wrongly) that I would suggest meeting up - which I wouldn’t have done as I know they would want time alone on their anniversary. I’m a little offended that she thought i would intrude on their getaway. Just for the record, I have never invited myself to her house or gate crashed anything she does with her family. Obviously had she replied to my text and said about meeting up I would have loved too but she didn’t and im fine with it but a simple reply from her like “ thank you, have a lovely time too” would have sufficed. Not a lie saying she had only just received it! Besides my husband and I were going for dinner (that we had reservation for) and to watch a show, so we wouldn’t have had much time to meet up with them anyway. I always thought we were good friends but this has made me question it!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 May 2023): Ok so I have to admit I did similar many years ago with my friend. My colleagues & I were on a night out (in a different city) my friend rang me (I didn’t her her call) leaving me a voicemail asking me if I was in this particular location as she thought she saw me but couldn’t find me & was out with some of her friends & if we wanted to meet up. Now I didn’t want too as I was having a nice time with my colleagues & my friend is a little annoying so I didn’t want her hanging around with us plus I think it would be weird for my friend to join a work thing! So I insisted with my colleagues we move on to another location.
I texted her the next day saying I had only got her voicemail as I had a problem
With my phone. She was none the wiser I had ignored her.
I’m not sure why your friend did what she did as it does sound you have good boundaries - unlike my friend…. Maybe she didn’t want to risk you suggesting meeting up. Unless she does something similar I’d just let it go.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 May 2023): she must have had her reasons, some of which you may not even guess at. but she did get in touch with you so let her little white lie go by the way. your old friends and when the time is right maybe you could ask her why but it's not important is it.now if she blanked you when you got home that would be different
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A
male
reader, kenny +, writes (22 May 2023):
 Well she did not make things easy for herself did she, as you say all she really had to do was just a simple text back saying have a nice time as well and catch up soon.
You have been friends with her for 14 years, has she ever done anything like this before in all those years?.
Now for what ever reason she has lied to you, maybe she had her husband in her ear telling her to delete it, who knows. Life is a learning curve, you won't forget that she lied to you and of course its really up to you now if you want to remain friends with her.
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